前些日子在网络上遇见二姐在线上，于是我们便闲聊了起来。
她问我对新的一年有什么新的展望？顿时之间，这问题似乎问倒我了。以往都喜欢在岁末写年录和新年展望的我，今年好象没有什么去想过这问题。是因为自己的脑袋不再思考了，还是因为自己已经在舒适的区域里麻木生活惯了，把一切理所当然化了？
其实不是自己没有展望。当二姐列出她认为是我新的一年的展望时，我都对她所列出的一一赞同。
首先，肯定是小宝贝勇杰的出世。我等了勇杰有一段日子了。可说是有一年之久吧！打从我上一次的怀孕失败后（去年11月的事），我和东威便渴慕快快再度怀孕。终于，上帝怜悯我们，让我在今年7月受孕，而且怀的是男孩。虽然咏恩和家翁家婆比较喜欢女孩，但是东威、我和许多的朋友都希望这一胎会是男孩。东威的原因是他觉得女孩到了一个阶段，他和孩子在身体接触上（如拥抱）会有一些限制（东威是一个很东方传统思想的人，他觉得男女应保持一些距离。。当然除了与伴侣之外。。。）我则希望勇齐会有一个玩伴（咏恩已经有3个表姐妹为伴了）。况且，东威和其他亲戚朋友的期望（希望孩子是男孩）也会多多少少影响我的期望。至于其他人的原因，那可要问他们了！！！ 嘻嘻嘻嘻！！！
我切切期待三月底的到来。其实来到这阶段，我想三个月并不难熬。再过几天，咏恩和勇齐就上学了。这是勇齐第一年上学。因此，我感到很兴奋。（对了，我希望两个孩子，尤其是勇齐，的身体会健康，抵抗力会很强）。我相信他会很喜欢学习。:)
他们上学，也就是说，我早上会有三个小时的空挡时间。我可以休息或用来完成还没完成的DVD学习。
开学的一个多月后就是华人新年了。这是我一直以来最喜欢的节日。今年很特别。因为是我第一次挺着个大肚子去拜年。我已经买好了过年的衣服。我迫不及待地想穿上它们游街去！当然，我也没有忘记为老公、孩子们添购新衣物的乐趣。其实自从我有了孩子之后，购买孩子们的物品似乎比购买自己的东西来得有趣！
过了华人新年，我就要为准备勇杰的衣物和床铺忙碌了。这真是叫我感到无比的兴奋！接着，就是好好地休息，养精畜锐地倒数日子！:)
我的预产期是在三月28日。就是学校term holiday 之后的一个星期。若是这一胎和以往两胎一样足月才生(满40周），我可能会面对自己一个人去医院的情景。我为此事祷告，求神让我在最好的时间分娩。好的时间的意思是，在勇杰足月，东威在我身边，咏恩、勇齐也有人帮我照料的情况下。我想不出有如此好的时间。但神的智慧高过我的智慧。我拭目以待他给我最好的时间。
我希望勇杰是个健康、快乐、乖巧且有智慧的好孩子。求神给我智慧来爱护他、教育他！
生产后，我希望自己能够坚持到底地给勇杰哺乳两年。我希望自己有足够的奶水，勇杰也会和我合作，晚上可以睡彻夜，好让我有足够的原因坚持到底（上一次我就是因为勇齐晚上每一、两个钟头就起来吮吸而决定在他10个月大时给他戒奶）！
另外，我希望自己在坐月子期间能好好地休息。我现在其实就已经很思念坐月子时吃的食物了。。。Yum Yum!!
说到吃，也让我想起我的另外一个期望。我希望生产完后可以瘦身，达到我刚结婚时的身材。。。嘻嘻嘻！！！我可是对这梦想充满憧憬喔！:)
最后，另一样让我兴奋的事是咏恩明年就要报读小学了。我希望她会顺利地进入工商小学。这学校是打从我搬到现在住的地方后就锁定的目标。
哈哈哈！我想这一些期望已经够我“忙”了吧！或许有人会纳闷为什么我没有提到关于自己的灵命或服事之类的期望。。。哈哈哈。。。孩子是上帝给的产业。我今年把焦点放在孩子和家庭身上，也就是将焦点放在服事上。我的孩子和家庭对我明年来说就是我服事的岗位。我会继续在咏恩的灵命方面打好基础，在勇齐的意识上让他认识上帝，在勇杰的属灵层面上迫切祷告。这就是我明年的服事。至于自己的灵命，我会继续在读经祷告的习惯上下更多苦功。。。求主耶稣与我同在，帮助我。愿我的展望是主所喜悦并愿意成全的。 Amen! :)
我的骄傲！
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Sunday, December 27, 2009
宝贝的名字出炉了！
前阵子在Facebook里头表意希望朋友们可以帮忙提议小宝贝的名字。。。实在非常感谢许多愿意和我们一起绞尽脑汁的亲戚好友们。你们实在给了我们许多很好很好的名字。有些是很酷的名字，有些则带有你们打从心里的祝福。
当中很酷的名字有二姐提议的“勇翮 (he2)”其意思是勇敢的翅膀。 还有东威的妹妹提出的“勇睿(rui4)”意思是勇敢又有智慧。说实在， 我真的很喜欢这两个名字。无论意思或文字都很特别，非常有“墨水”！可见二姐和我小姑（东威的妹妹就是我的小姑）的语文程度是“dun play play”的！！！
另外也有我的“媳妇”昌冰 （是的，她整天对我的勇齐虎视眈眈，几乎整个教会都听过她喊勇齐“相公”。所以我不是她的家婆是什么？kekeke...）好意的祝福，提议小宝贝的名字叫“永康”，因她说勇齐的身体好象不是很好（尤其是前两年），一直要看医生。她希望小宝贝的身体会很健康。因此便提议这名字。除了昌冰，我的阿姨，ah may，也有提议此名字。她的原因很好笑。她说《还珠格格》的五阿哥叫“永祺”(yongqi，与勇齐同音），那弟弟就和驸马一样名字，叫“永康”好了！（ehhh... Ah may 啊，驸马不叫永康，他叫尔康啦！！！）
另外，表妹慧敏也提供了“勇翔”，勇敢飞翔之含义。还有从前的上司提议的勇俊、勇乐。。。喜欢音乐的堂妹甚至提议“永乐”（yue4）等等等。。。
有了那么多超棒的名字，再加上之前我自己日想夜思的一些名字，我“呈上”了一份名单给我的生意伙伴“大股东”，也就是孩子的爸（不是吗？我们俩虽都各占50％的股份，我的职责是“酝酿”产品，他则是提供“原料”和接下来的 development investment（发展投资）。所以就运作守则来说，他扮演的角色非凡。因此，我想最关键的决定权应该来自他！
他当时一看，就非常果断地选了“勇杰”意思是勇敢又杰出。他说“杰”字比较容易写，以后小宝贝学写自己的名字时就不会那么痛苦。这一点我也真是同意。我可不想孩子因无法很好或正确地书写自己的名字而感到沮丧，甚至讨厌华文。。。况且，“勇杰”这个名字也蛮符合我对这小宝贝的期望与怀他的异象。
怀咏恩却还不知道自己已怀孕的时候，在一次的敬拜中，我告诉神我和我的孩子会一生敬拜他。因此，怀咏恩的异象是她是一个敬拜者，她要歌咏上帝的恩典。英文名字是Joen!
怀勇齐，但还不知道他的性别的时候，我在一次敬拜中看见一个年轻的壮年跳着战舞。接下来，有姐美为我祷告，说这孩子是上帝的勇士。因此勇齐的名字的意思是勇士所有特征都齐全了。英文名字为Joshua!
怀这一胎，我觉得这孩子会有大卫王的特征。大卫王，尽管自己不是什么“大”人物，但是当有人（哥利亚）亵渎上帝的名字的时候，他却勇敢且有信心地站出来阻止，且不靠兵器也不靠盔甲，单靠主耶和华的同在与力量，用简单的石头和吊索，便把比他高大几倍的敌人给打败了。
因此，勇杰，既勇敢又杰出，正合乎这异象。英文名字，我把他取为Joel！
再一次地感谢大家愿意为小宝贝的名字出一份力。希望大家会喜欢“勇杰”这个名字。在此祝福大家新年快乐！:)
当中很酷的名字有二姐提议的“勇翮 (he2)”其意思是勇敢的翅膀。 还有东威的妹妹提出的“勇睿(rui4)”意思是勇敢又有智慧。说实在， 我真的很喜欢这两个名字。无论意思或文字都很特别，非常有“墨水”！可见二姐和我小姑（东威的妹妹就是我的小姑）的语文程度是“dun play play”的！！！
另外也有我的“媳妇”昌冰 （是的，她整天对我的勇齐虎视眈眈，几乎整个教会都听过她喊勇齐“相公”。所以我不是她的家婆是什么？kekeke...）好意的祝福，提议小宝贝的名字叫“永康”，因她说勇齐的身体好象不是很好（尤其是前两年），一直要看医生。她希望小宝贝的身体会很健康。因此便提议这名字。除了昌冰，我的阿姨，ah may，也有提议此名字。她的原因很好笑。她说《还珠格格》的五阿哥叫“永祺”(yongqi，与勇齐同音），那弟弟就和驸马一样名字，叫“永康”好了！（ehhh... Ah may 啊，驸马不叫永康，他叫尔康啦！！！）
另外，表妹慧敏也提供了“勇翔”，勇敢飞翔之含义。还有从前的上司提议的勇俊、勇乐。。。喜欢音乐的堂妹甚至提议“永乐”（yue4）等等等。。。
有了那么多超棒的名字，再加上之前我自己日想夜思的一些名字，我“呈上”了一份名单给我的生意伙伴“大股东”，也就是孩子的爸（不是吗？我们俩虽都各占50％的股份，我的职责是“酝酿”产品，他则是提供“原料”和接下来的 development investment（发展投资）。所以就运作守则来说，他扮演的角色非凡。因此，我想最关键的决定权应该来自他！
他当时一看，就非常果断地选了“勇杰”意思是勇敢又杰出。他说“杰”字比较容易写，以后小宝贝学写自己的名字时就不会那么痛苦。这一点我也真是同意。我可不想孩子因无法很好或正确地书写自己的名字而感到沮丧，甚至讨厌华文。。。况且，“勇杰”这个名字也蛮符合我对这小宝贝的期望与怀他的异象。
怀咏恩却还不知道自己已怀孕的时候，在一次的敬拜中，我告诉神我和我的孩子会一生敬拜他。因此，怀咏恩的异象是她是一个敬拜者，她要歌咏上帝的恩典。英文名字是Joen!
怀勇齐，但还不知道他的性别的时候，我在一次敬拜中看见一个年轻的壮年跳着战舞。接下来，有姐美为我祷告，说这孩子是上帝的勇士。因此勇齐的名字的意思是勇士所有特征都齐全了。英文名字为Joshua!
怀这一胎，我觉得这孩子会有大卫王的特征。大卫王，尽管自己不是什么“大”人物，但是当有人（哥利亚）亵渎上帝的名字的时候，他却勇敢且有信心地站出来阻止，且不靠兵器也不靠盔甲，单靠主耶和华的同在与力量，用简单的石头和吊索，便把比他高大几倍的敌人给打败了。
因此，勇杰，既勇敢又杰出，正合乎这异象。英文名字，我把他取为Joel！
再一次地感谢大家愿意为小宝贝的名字出一份力。希望大家会喜欢“勇杰”这个名字。在此祝福大家新年快乐！:)
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Bintan family trip
still remember me and my family went for genting and cameron highland last june... the experience was not very good as we were following tour package and we need to rush according to their itinarary...
This time we went Bintan and we decided not to go thru tour agent. we did booking of resort and ferry ticket ourselves. the whole thing was free and easy...
as we booked our own accomodation, we were able to state our preference... i requested for a ground level, garden facing, quiet and non smoking room. fine enough, our room was so marvellous! it turned out to be our dream room... staying in it alone was relaxing enough!!! the children simply enjoyed blowing bubbles at the balcony.. too bad, if we had brought a ball and a kite, everything would be so perfect!!!!
due to high budget put aside by boss for this trip, our spending power this time was higher... we ate good food in good atmosphered restaurant. thou it was not at the high end restaurant, i was happy enough with my boss's generosity! imagine spending $92 on a buffet dinner, $52 on a lunch and $65 on another alacarte dinner... wow!!!
We were lucky that there was a fireworks during our first night stay... the kids were so excited as the show was very near to our room... i was not as fortunate to be able to catch the show cuz i was busy making use of the bathtub available... kekeke...
I think the best part of the trip was we were very near to the beach.. and there were fish in the water!!!! Boss and maid (my hubby and i la) had great time catching fish by the sea water... while yongen explored along the beach and yongqi busy digging hole in the sand... all of us were dirty at the end of the beach visit.. but we wouldnt care much since our room was so near and it was a resort room!!! (kekeke... sorry la... if it was our own house then we need to worry how to keep the area clean ...
the kids tried something that they had never done before... they played bungy bounce!!! and they really enjoyed so much!!! yongqi kept saying 'bungy is fun'...
for me, there was a moment which i was really touched... there was a live band at the lobby in the evening... the songs that they presented were 90s songs... and they really reminded me of my young days... and for that moment i suddenly miss my peers and friends... thoughts of how i wished i am still single and free, and was with them, lazing at the lobby sofa enjoying the breeze and the band.... then suddenly, i wort of waken from the dream... telling myself i have no regret as i have a wonderful hubby and children.... i almost teared hugging my yongen at that moment...
overall, i really love the trip!!! i really thank my dear boss for initiating this breakaway. Thank you my dear! MUAK!
This time we went Bintan and we decided not to go thru tour agent. we did booking of resort and ferry ticket ourselves. the whole thing was free and easy...
as we booked our own accomodation, we were able to state our preference... i requested for a ground level, garden facing, quiet and non smoking room. fine enough, our room was so marvellous! it turned out to be our dream room... staying in it alone was relaxing enough!!! the children simply enjoyed blowing bubbles at the balcony.. too bad, if we had brought a ball and a kite, everything would be so perfect!!!!
due to high budget put aside by boss for this trip, our spending power this time was higher... we ate good food in good atmosphered restaurant. thou it was not at the high end restaurant, i was happy enough with my boss's generosity! imagine spending $92 on a buffet dinner, $52 on a lunch and $65 on another alacarte dinner... wow!!!
We were lucky that there was a fireworks during our first night stay... the kids were so excited as the show was very near to our room... i was not as fortunate to be able to catch the show cuz i was busy making use of the bathtub available... kekeke...
I think the best part of the trip was we were very near to the beach.. and there were fish in the water!!!! Boss and maid (my hubby and i la) had great time catching fish by the sea water... while yongen explored along the beach and yongqi busy digging hole in the sand... all of us were dirty at the end of the beach visit.. but we wouldnt care much since our room was so near and it was a resort room!!! (kekeke... sorry la... if it was our own house then we need to worry how to keep the area clean ...
the kids tried something that they had never done before... they played bungy bounce!!! and they really enjoyed so much!!! yongqi kept saying 'bungy is fun'...
for me, there was a moment which i was really touched... there was a live band at the lobby in the evening... the songs that they presented were 90s songs... and they really reminded me of my young days... and for that moment i suddenly miss my peers and friends... thoughts of how i wished i am still single and free, and was with them, lazing at the lobby sofa enjoying the breeze and the band.... then suddenly, i wort of waken from the dream... telling myself i have no regret as i have a wonderful hubby and children.... i almost teared hugging my yongen at that moment...
overall, i really love the trip!!! i really thank my dear boss for initiating this breakaway. Thank you my dear! MUAK!
shoo shoo gestational diebetes...
yoz, its been some times since i last blog.... my pregnancy is in my 26th weeks, which is 6 and half months le :). lil fellow is active. he has started to show his kicks and boxes... i enjoy seeing my tummy jerking side to side and lumps out of tummy... i really enjoy thou maybe little discomfort...
yesterday i went to my gynae for a glucose tolerant test. i was supposed to fast overnight then take blood then drink a very sweet syrup and test blood again 2 hours later... result is not good! my reading showed 11. which it is supposed to be below 7 lor.... thus my gynae is very concerned. she said that very high chance that i need to do insulin injection if the glucose level is this high. i am given 3 weeks to try out diet control to see if my glucose can be controlled.. if no, i need to inject myself with insulin.. yak!!!
how to test blood? i am asked to buy a glucometer, poke myself 6 times a day, twice a week, to check my level ad keep record of what my reading and what i eat... thru this, i realise that i am a 'live to eat' person.. feeling so miserable with this cant eat that cant eat kinda situation... haiz!!! Lord, please help me to get the glucose under control... i dun wan to do the insulin injection... please....
i was in the verge of having gestational diebetes too when i carried yongen and yongqi.. thus they were big babies... in fact due to this problem, my kids are not supposed to take too sweet stuff cuz their risk of having diabetes are higher than normal people... my gynae told me that my this lil fellow (in my tummy) will be a big fellow... his size now is 1kg and equivalent to 27th week pregnancy baby!!! she said he will sure hit 4kg and hopefully not too much beyond.. else i may need c-section!!!! Lord, help me to able to deliver this lil fellow naturally and may the delivery be smooth and good. Please protect him. Let him be a healthy and wise child. Thank you Lord, in Jesus name i pray, Amen!
yesterday i went to my gynae for a glucose tolerant test. i was supposed to fast overnight then take blood then drink a very sweet syrup and test blood again 2 hours later... result is not good! my reading showed 11. which it is supposed to be below 7 lor.... thus my gynae is very concerned. she said that very high chance that i need to do insulin injection if the glucose level is this high. i am given 3 weeks to try out diet control to see if my glucose can be controlled.. if no, i need to inject myself with insulin.. yak!!!
how to test blood? i am asked to buy a glucometer, poke myself 6 times a day, twice a week, to check my level ad keep record of what my reading and what i eat... thru this, i realise that i am a 'live to eat' person.. feeling so miserable with this cant eat that cant eat kinda situation... haiz!!! Lord, please help me to get the glucose under control... i dun wan to do the insulin injection... please....
i was in the verge of having gestational diebetes too when i carried yongen and yongqi.. thus they were big babies... in fact due to this problem, my kids are not supposed to take too sweet stuff cuz their risk of having diabetes are higher than normal people... my gynae told me that my this lil fellow (in my tummy) will be a big fellow... his size now is 1kg and equivalent to 27th week pregnancy baby!!! she said he will sure hit 4kg and hopefully not too much beyond.. else i may need c-section!!!! Lord, help me to able to deliver this lil fellow naturally and may the delivery be smooth and good. Please protect him. Let him be a healthy and wise child. Thank you Lord, in Jesus name i pray, Amen!
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
another teapot
hahaha here i am blogging again... hope i still have readers here!!!
yesterday i went to visit my gynae.. as this is my 18th week pregnancy and during my last visit at week 15th the baby did not cooperate by opening its leg to show its gender, i really hope this time he would be more cooperative... i am really anxious to know is it a he or a she.
my original appointment date is supposed to be coming thursday. but since my friend was available to help me babysit my older children when they are napping at home, i must as well change the appointment date.. when i called the clinic, i was told that doc was waiting for call from the labor ward. ie. she was on a standby for a delivery case... and i managed to make my appointment at 3.15pm. (initially i wanted the 3.30pm slot but it was taken up so i took the 3.15pm one instead). my friend reached my place 2.30pm. and at that time if i took a bus to the clinic, i should be able to make it for my appointment. however, i have a feeling i should take a cab down and at the end i did. Thank God i did. As i reached earlier, i went in the room at about 3pm. and when i came out, the labor ward called for the doc. so the doc had to postpone all appointments and rushed to the hospital. i saw few angry patients, esp those who just reached from far away place by cab... well, i can understand their frustration. and i think if i were they, i would feel angry too. but come to think of it, who needed the doc more at that point of time? if i were the patient at the labor ward, i surely wanted my doc to fly over immdiately... hmm...
come back to the scan...
this lil fellow is really mischievious. he was literally in sitting position which according to my gynae, the most difficult position to see the gender... my gynae knew that i would be disappointed if we couldnt get to see the gender again, so she tried very hard, all ways, shook the baby... etc, to made lil fellow shift. finally she said she caught a view of what we wanted to see. but it was partially covered by the baby's foot. so it was not a clear view actually... thus she continue trying.. guess what, the very next moment, the baby used its hand to cover its private part!!!! alemak... the gynae really laughed... 'cute fellow' she said.
we kept trying.... till finally we caught the view of the little teapot. a clear one. so clear that i can even see... hahaha
ya, another boy on the way!!!!
back home, i told dw the baby is a boy. he is very happy. its exactly what he wants.then i broke the news to yongen... she been so hopeful that baby will be a girl so that the girl team at home will win.... i showed her the scan... explained to her each part of the pic. then pointing at the crucial part, i asked her do u know what is this? she shook her head. then i told her, 'its the kukujiao'
she looked at me stunned. and i asked, 'so u know this is didi or meimei?'
softly she answered,'didi' i said yes its didi... after i said that, she turned away with disappointment and refused to look at my tummy... she was really disappointed... she kept mumbling,' i dun wan didi. didi very naughty one' then i told her,'baby is so sad that jiejie dun like him... u know baby likes jiejie so much cuz since conceived jiejie has been praying for him... but now jiejie rejecting him... poor baby...' then she said,'but didi very naughty one. i dun like didi....' so i told her,'you can pray for didi now that he will be a good and obedient boy, will listen to jiejie...' after much psychoing, she finally accepted what i said and prayed for baby again and kissed it... hahaha... now she would on and off come to my tummy and sayang and play with her new didi...
really thank God for another teapot. in fact i think we need another boy la... recently qi kept saying he is a princess then imitate baby bob danced ballet step across the room... i keep correcting him that he is a prince, not princess... then at my mum side, all the cousins are gals, en's gang and playmates. it would be good that qi has a brother with him....
May the Lord bless this lil son of mine. let him be strong, healthy and safe. Thank God!
yesterday i went to visit my gynae.. as this is my 18th week pregnancy and during my last visit at week 15th the baby did not cooperate by opening its leg to show its gender, i really hope this time he would be more cooperative... i am really anxious to know is it a he or a she.
my original appointment date is supposed to be coming thursday. but since my friend was available to help me babysit my older children when they are napping at home, i must as well change the appointment date.. when i called the clinic, i was told that doc was waiting for call from the labor ward. ie. she was on a standby for a delivery case... and i managed to make my appointment at 3.15pm. (initially i wanted the 3.30pm slot but it was taken up so i took the 3.15pm one instead). my friend reached my place 2.30pm. and at that time if i took a bus to the clinic, i should be able to make it for my appointment. however, i have a feeling i should take a cab down and at the end i did. Thank God i did. As i reached earlier, i went in the room at about 3pm. and when i came out, the labor ward called for the doc. so the doc had to postpone all appointments and rushed to the hospital. i saw few angry patients, esp those who just reached from far away place by cab... well, i can understand their frustration. and i think if i were they, i would feel angry too. but come to think of it, who needed the doc more at that point of time? if i were the patient at the labor ward, i surely wanted my doc to fly over immdiately... hmm...
come back to the scan...
this lil fellow is really mischievious. he was literally in sitting position which according to my gynae, the most difficult position to see the gender... my gynae knew that i would be disappointed if we couldnt get to see the gender again, so she tried very hard, all ways, shook the baby... etc, to made lil fellow shift. finally she said she caught a view of what we wanted to see. but it was partially covered by the baby's foot. so it was not a clear view actually... thus she continue trying.. guess what, the very next moment, the baby used its hand to cover its private part!!!! alemak... the gynae really laughed... 'cute fellow' she said.
we kept trying.... till finally we caught the view of the little teapot. a clear one. so clear that i can even see... hahaha
ya, another boy on the way!!!!
back home, i told dw the baby is a boy. he is very happy. its exactly what he wants.then i broke the news to yongen... she been so hopeful that baby will be a girl so that the girl team at home will win.... i showed her the scan... explained to her each part of the pic. then pointing at the crucial part, i asked her do u know what is this? she shook her head. then i told her, 'its the kukujiao'
she looked at me stunned. and i asked, 'so u know this is didi or meimei?'
softly she answered,'didi' i said yes its didi... after i said that, she turned away with disappointment and refused to look at my tummy... she was really disappointed... she kept mumbling,' i dun wan didi. didi very naughty one' then i told her,'baby is so sad that jiejie dun like him... u know baby likes jiejie so much cuz since conceived jiejie has been praying for him... but now jiejie rejecting him... poor baby...' then she said,'but didi very naughty one. i dun like didi....' so i told her,'you can pray for didi now that he will be a good and obedient boy, will listen to jiejie...' after much psychoing, she finally accepted what i said and prayed for baby again and kissed it... hahaha... now she would on and off come to my tummy and sayang and play with her new didi...
really thank God for another teapot. in fact i think we need another boy la... recently qi kept saying he is a princess then imitate baby bob danced ballet step across the room... i keep correcting him that he is a prince, not princess... then at my mum side, all the cousins are gals, en's gang and playmates. it would be good that qi has a brother with him....
May the Lord bless this lil son of mine. let him be strong, healthy and safe. Thank God!
Friday, October 16, 2009
PDA Video
this is what PDA closure all about. En will be undergoing the surgery Jan next yr. Please pray for smooth surgery...
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
update update update...
Yoz, long time haven updated my blog.... kekeke...
finally the merlion syndrome has subsided... though it still come back once a while when i ate the wrong thing or when i was too hungry... ya.. i get hungry easily...
I am now moving into my 16 weeks pregnancy. yep, thats 4 months! but i dun look like i am 4 months lor.. i looked as if i am 5 or 6 months... yayaya... people play joke on me, saying even when i was not pregnant, my tummy was also that big.. thank you ar!
went for gynae check up last sat... hoping that the gynae could tell me the gender of the baby... but as i was made to wait more than half an hour outside, sitting on a comfortable couch, reading peacefully, lil fellow fell asleep in me, hiding at one corner of the womb.. resulted, cant see anything cuz he/she 'giap' tightly and no matter how the gynae shook, it refused to move.... so different from my last visit when he was soooooo active that the gynae had a difficult time measuring him...
ohhh... i cant wait for the time to come when i can feel his kick and movement... i told en that when it grows bigger it could even hi-5 with her!!!! kekeke... she is definitely excited. and she is also very sensible. she helped me with many chores... fold clothings, keep toys... etc
another update that worth mentioning.... yongqi has finally passed his 'without diaper during nap time' training. now he would wake up to pee into the toilet bowl when he needs to... hmm... think soon i will start train him for the night time one... i believe he is ready!
we have finally decided to let yongen undergo the surgery to close her heart murmur... her appointment will be next jan. we have waited for 5 yrs already and the doctor confirm that the murmur will not close by itself. i hope that during the school holiday, someone would cancel his appointment so that we could get an earlier date. i hope to get it done before she goes p1. and of course b4 i give birth cuz after giving birth i will be breastfeeding the baby so the baby will need to stay by my side 24 hours... in order to be able to attend to her in the hospital, i have to get her done asap. she needs to be hospitalised for 3 days for the surgery.
its not easy to come out with such decision. but i think we need to close it somehow. else it would be troublesome for en even when she grows up. she needs to do follow up with kk annually due to the murmur. and in case she needs any surgery, even as minor as dental case, she needs to remember to report her murmur condition so that special care has to be taken to avoid infection. in case infection does take place... it would be as serious as 3 weeks hospitalization case. right now, en still young. so every single procedure, i am going thru with her. and i always remember to report her murmur condition to any doctor she seeing. but i thought, say if one day, i am not around, then would the daddy remember to report the condition? will en herself remember to do so? or let say if any accident happen outside... no one would know such special medical need... and i also worry say if in future she undergoes childbirth... need c section... would the murmur cause complication? well, as i say, i cant be with her forever and every minute. once she hits p1, its another phrase in her life and before i realise, she has become independant... now i believe time really flies... not to mention when she hot p1, se actually has grown so much independant now... so many things, i leave it to herself. and she is managing well. the only thing she still yet to break thru, is to clean herself after she poos!!! hahaha... she simply refuse to try that!!!! hahaha... other than that, i allow her to wash her own cup and cookie bowl, fold clothings, change her own clothings after come back from school and hang her own uniform, shower herself (occasionally i do it for her esp when it comes to hair wash) and ensure that she throws her own laundry into the washing machine... she even requested me to allow her to prepare milk herself.. but since it involves some hygiene matter, i kiv it. hmm... maybe i should think of a way to do that... ya why not?
come to yongqi, as usual, my carefree and happy boy! ladies and aunties killer still... with his language skill now, he is even more loveable! sometimes he can be really sweet, asking me to be careful when he sees that the floor is wet, ask if it hurts when the hair dresser pulled my hair to cut... he also can consider independant actually... many times i left him on the rides when i hop into nearby store to buy somethings... and when he finishes, he would come look for me. once there was an auntie so afraid that he might get lost... she accompanied him to look for me.. hahaha he is simply to cute.
Thank God for all these experiences. I believe that the third child of mine will be another irresistible one!!! extra cute, extra wise, extra independant, extra adorable! Amen!!!
:)
finally the merlion syndrome has subsided... though it still come back once a while when i ate the wrong thing or when i was too hungry... ya.. i get hungry easily...
I am now moving into my 16 weeks pregnancy. yep, thats 4 months! but i dun look like i am 4 months lor.. i looked as if i am 5 or 6 months... yayaya... people play joke on me, saying even when i was not pregnant, my tummy was also that big.. thank you ar!
went for gynae check up last sat... hoping that the gynae could tell me the gender of the baby... but as i was made to wait more than half an hour outside, sitting on a comfortable couch, reading peacefully, lil fellow fell asleep in me, hiding at one corner of the womb.. resulted, cant see anything cuz he/she 'giap' tightly and no matter how the gynae shook, it refused to move.... so different from my last visit when he was soooooo active that the gynae had a difficult time measuring him...
ohhh... i cant wait for the time to come when i can feel his kick and movement... i told en that when it grows bigger it could even hi-5 with her!!!! kekeke... she is definitely excited. and she is also very sensible. she helped me with many chores... fold clothings, keep toys... etc
another update that worth mentioning.... yongqi has finally passed his 'without diaper during nap time' training. now he would wake up to pee into the toilet bowl when he needs to... hmm... think soon i will start train him for the night time one... i believe he is ready!
we have finally decided to let yongen undergo the surgery to close her heart murmur... her appointment will be next jan. we have waited for 5 yrs already and the doctor confirm that the murmur will not close by itself. i hope that during the school holiday, someone would cancel his appointment so that we could get an earlier date. i hope to get it done before she goes p1. and of course b4 i give birth cuz after giving birth i will be breastfeeding the baby so the baby will need to stay by my side 24 hours... in order to be able to attend to her in the hospital, i have to get her done asap. she needs to be hospitalised for 3 days for the surgery.
its not easy to come out with such decision. but i think we need to close it somehow. else it would be troublesome for en even when she grows up. she needs to do follow up with kk annually due to the murmur. and in case she needs any surgery, even as minor as dental case, she needs to remember to report her murmur condition so that special care has to be taken to avoid infection. in case infection does take place... it would be as serious as 3 weeks hospitalization case. right now, en still young. so every single procedure, i am going thru with her. and i always remember to report her murmur condition to any doctor she seeing. but i thought, say if one day, i am not around, then would the daddy remember to report the condition? will en herself remember to do so? or let say if any accident happen outside... no one would know such special medical need... and i also worry say if in future she undergoes childbirth... need c section... would the murmur cause complication? well, as i say, i cant be with her forever and every minute. once she hits p1, its another phrase in her life and before i realise, she has become independant... now i believe time really flies... not to mention when she hot p1, se actually has grown so much independant now... so many things, i leave it to herself. and she is managing well. the only thing she still yet to break thru, is to clean herself after she poos!!! hahaha... she simply refuse to try that!!!! hahaha... other than that, i allow her to wash her own cup and cookie bowl, fold clothings, change her own clothings after come back from school and hang her own uniform, shower herself (occasionally i do it for her esp when it comes to hair wash) and ensure that she throws her own laundry into the washing machine... she even requested me to allow her to prepare milk herself.. but since it involves some hygiene matter, i kiv it. hmm... maybe i should think of a way to do that... ya why not?
come to yongqi, as usual, my carefree and happy boy! ladies and aunties killer still... with his language skill now, he is even more loveable! sometimes he can be really sweet, asking me to be careful when he sees that the floor is wet, ask if it hurts when the hair dresser pulled my hair to cut... he also can consider independant actually... many times i left him on the rides when i hop into nearby store to buy somethings... and when he finishes, he would come look for me. once there was an auntie so afraid that he might get lost... she accompanied him to look for me.. hahaha he is simply to cute.
Thank God for all these experiences. I believe that the third child of mine will be another irresistible one!!! extra cute, extra wise, extra independant, extra adorable! Amen!!!
:)
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Thank God
It had been very difficult time for me past few weeks.... very unwell... befriended with merlion, threw out often.... staying awake became a chore to me.... got tired soooo easily... but good thing and i thank God. All these show that things are going on well.... :)
another thing to give thanks... my hubby is really caring and supportive this time... i can feel that the last experience had really hit him hard on his head... thus my mood is sooo much soother compared to my past preggy experiences.
children wise, they are so far so good. they are the most co-operative young children i believe. really need to praise them. esp yongen. she really is so sensible and caring. she is always the first one to rush into the toilet, pat on to my back and ask if i am ok whenever she heard me puking... every night she would pray for the baby... and its the most wonderful prayer i ever heard, really... i remember once she prayed so: "Thank you Jesus for giving us a baby. Please let the baby be happy and healthy. let mummy be comfortable. also bless didi co operate with mummy. let our baby has wisdom. can play with us. can learn ABC and 123... let him be like us. thank you Jesus. In Jesus' name, Amen." (she prayed in mandarin)
not only she prayed for the baby. she also prayed for her grandpa and grandma's salvation... and once, her prayer made me cry on the spot... " Dear Jesus, please let my gong gong and ma ma dun get old... let them be strong. they are also your 'bao bao' (means baby), YOu love them. please let them hear You and Your angels at night. let them believe in You, come to church with us to worship You. Thank you Jesus." this prayer really melted my heart... a simple yet touching prayer that i am unable to do....
Thank God that my children are so wonderful and beautiful. I believe that this coming one will be another attractive fellow too. I know it. We are already bonded... really look forward to meet this fellow... but it would be after cny... kekeke... what an exciting year to come...
another thing to give thanks... my hubby is really caring and supportive this time... i can feel that the last experience had really hit him hard on his head... thus my mood is sooo much soother compared to my past preggy experiences.
children wise, they are so far so good. they are the most co-operative young children i believe. really need to praise them. esp yongen. she really is so sensible and caring. she is always the first one to rush into the toilet, pat on to my back and ask if i am ok whenever she heard me puking... every night she would pray for the baby... and its the most wonderful prayer i ever heard, really... i remember once she prayed so: "Thank you Jesus for giving us a baby. Please let the baby be happy and healthy. let mummy be comfortable. also bless didi co operate with mummy. let our baby has wisdom. can play with us. can learn ABC and 123... let him be like us. thank you Jesus. In Jesus' name, Amen." (she prayed in mandarin)
not only she prayed for the baby. she also prayed for her grandpa and grandma's salvation... and once, her prayer made me cry on the spot... " Dear Jesus, please let my gong gong and ma ma dun get old... let them be strong. they are also your 'bao bao' (means baby), YOu love them. please let them hear You and Your angels at night. let them believe in You, come to church with us to worship You. Thank you Jesus." this prayer really melted my heart... a simple yet touching prayer that i am unable to do....
Thank God that my children are so wonderful and beautiful. I believe that this coming one will be another attractive fellow too. I know it. We are already bonded... really look forward to meet this fellow... but it would be after cny... kekeke... what an exciting year to come...
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Its soooo exciting....
Something exciting coming on the way... I really like to share much but its not the right times yet.... God is faithful! It will be a brand new challenging start for us next year and in years to come... Am so excited about it...
(kekeke... the 'sell box' (mai guan zi) thing learn from my sis one... kekeke)
(kekeke... the 'sell box' (mai guan zi) thing learn from my sis one... kekeke)
Friday, July 10, 2009
Monday, July 6, 2009
Bed Bugs- Preventions And Remedies
this passage about bed bug is very good. indeed bed bug is obviously not welcomed in any home.... hope this is useful for all readers.
Bed Bugs- Preventions And Remedies
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Bed Bugs- Preventions And Remedies
Shared via AddThis
Friday, June 26, 2009
May God give me wisdom
Haiz... by friend's recommendation and testimony (he lose 10kg in one half month!!), i visited a MLM body wellness lab yesterday... the inbody analysis the consultant did with me showed me which part of me contributed the weight problem. frankly i was impressed with the machine they using... compared to the london weight, i would say that their consultation portion is indeed more professional.
products and packages were then recommended to me. vitamins supplement, appetite suppresser, cow's colostrum product, etc etc plus acupunture session and more inbody analysis.... total abt 2.7k! and she promised that i am able to lose 5 to 10kg within 3 months! well, it was indeed tempting at that moment.
but when i asked her what happen if in the midst of the treatment i got pregnant... she told me i could still continue taking some of the supplement but certain portion of prog needed to be kiv... upon hearing this i sort of retreat... i dun want the 'london weight' experience again... and oh ya... i haven completed my london weight package lor...
at the end, i only signed for the membership (10 dollars) cuz i guessed what i hoped for was they release me 'safely' plus i may indeed consider getting one or two of the product to try.. thank God the consultant did not bug me to sign the package.. though when i came out the sales director sort of did so which i was quite pissed off..that sales director, giving me the impression of typical 'MLM personel' which i hated most!!! he was trying to show me photos of his clients in his handphone... the past and present showing the result thing.. i was like hey you are not supposed to do tt!!!
Over the afternoon, i spent my time at a cafe reading their catelogue and think back of their products and offer... hey i realised that thou every weight problem case is different, all the treatment they recommending seems indifferent! its like treating all sickness with panadol like that... hmm... ok packge not in consideration!!!!
Talked to susan too on the phone yesterday... she advised me to keep the pregnancy plan 5 months later... so that it would be a year after my D&C (my D&C wsa last Nov). honestly, i really hate waitinig for so long... if i know i am ovulating at this minute i would rape my hubby man!!! kekeke... but the ovary seems not working hard... despite the homones pill i had taken for april and may... (i stop the june one due to the trip)... maybe the Lord knows my impatience... so He disallow me to ovulate?!?! dunno.. bu dong leh!!!!!
This morning i suddenly have an urge to discuss with my hubby whether should we really kiv the pregnancy plan, do some control for the next 3 to 4 months... so that i could go back to london weight to finish my course... the reason y i have the thought of slimming down before my pregnancy is cuz gynae ever told me that my ovulation problem is due to homones prob and the homones prob is causes by my weight prob... but yet... my weight prob is due to my homones prob also... ya sort of chain reaction... and also... if i get pregnant at my current weight, i think i would be even tougher for me to loose weight... but the thought of losing the chance of getting preg pulled me back... i really dun want to miss a single chance of it...
I am asking God what should i do...ok after susan's talk, i sort of not as gan jiong like last time le... last time i would feel depressed, disappointed and even angry everytime my test kit showed negative result... now at least i dun feel so and find that i should treasure the given time with my en and qi... before the third one arrives. hahaha... and another thing... i keep having this thought... when i get pregnant for my next child, i will make sure i pamper myself, buy nice nice maternity clothings to wear... i will extra pamper my third child, decorate his/her cot with cute stuff... make him/her comfortable, etc... cuz our plan is to have 3 children... thus the next one should be the last one le... haha scarly next pregnancy twins!!!! ooo... that will be fun!!!! kekeke...
Haiz, when will the next pregnancy arrives? i really look forward to the experience... i miss that kind of 'morning sickness' (yes, if you know that morning sickness actually confirms you that the bb is growing and doing well in your womb, you will sppreciate morning sickness), that kind of 'tian can jiao' or 'wu ying jiao' tt the bb gives in the womb and the moment when you meet him/her face to face... wow... really looking forward ley... waiting is always tough... but when it finally comes, the joy is tremendous!
products and packages were then recommended to me. vitamins supplement, appetite suppresser, cow's colostrum product, etc etc plus acupunture session and more inbody analysis.... total abt 2.7k! and she promised that i am able to lose 5 to 10kg within 3 months! well, it was indeed tempting at that moment.
but when i asked her what happen if in the midst of the treatment i got pregnant... she told me i could still continue taking some of the supplement but certain portion of prog needed to be kiv... upon hearing this i sort of retreat... i dun want the 'london weight' experience again... and oh ya... i haven completed my london weight package lor...
at the end, i only signed for the membership (10 dollars) cuz i guessed what i hoped for was they release me 'safely' plus i may indeed consider getting one or two of the product to try.. thank God the consultant did not bug me to sign the package.. though when i came out the sales director sort of did so which i was quite pissed off..that sales director, giving me the impression of typical 'MLM personel' which i hated most!!! he was trying to show me photos of his clients in his handphone... the past and present showing the result thing.. i was like hey you are not supposed to do tt!!!
Over the afternoon, i spent my time at a cafe reading their catelogue and think back of their products and offer... hey i realised that thou every weight problem case is different, all the treatment they recommending seems indifferent! its like treating all sickness with panadol like that... hmm... ok packge not in consideration!!!!
Talked to susan too on the phone yesterday... she advised me to keep the pregnancy plan 5 months later... so that it would be a year after my D&C (my D&C wsa last Nov). honestly, i really hate waitinig for so long... if i know i am ovulating at this minute i would rape my hubby man!!! kekeke... but the ovary seems not working hard... despite the homones pill i had taken for april and may... (i stop the june one due to the trip)... maybe the Lord knows my impatience... so He disallow me to ovulate?!?! dunno.. bu dong leh!!!!!
This morning i suddenly have an urge to discuss with my hubby whether should we really kiv the pregnancy plan, do some control for the next 3 to 4 months... so that i could go back to london weight to finish my course... the reason y i have the thought of slimming down before my pregnancy is cuz gynae ever told me that my ovulation problem is due to homones prob and the homones prob is causes by my weight prob... but yet... my weight prob is due to my homones prob also... ya sort of chain reaction... and also... if i get pregnant at my current weight, i think i would be even tougher for me to loose weight... but the thought of losing the chance of getting preg pulled me back... i really dun want to miss a single chance of it...
I am asking God what should i do...ok after susan's talk, i sort of not as gan jiong like last time le... last time i would feel depressed, disappointed and even angry everytime my test kit showed negative result... now at least i dun feel so and find that i should treasure the given time with my en and qi... before the third one arrives. hahaha... and another thing... i keep having this thought... when i get pregnant for my next child, i will make sure i pamper myself, buy nice nice maternity clothings to wear... i will extra pamper my third child, decorate his/her cot with cute stuff... make him/her comfortable, etc... cuz our plan is to have 3 children... thus the next one should be the last one le... haha scarly next pregnancy twins!!!! ooo... that will be fun!!!! kekeke...
Haiz, when will the next pregnancy arrives? i really look forward to the experience... i miss that kind of 'morning sickness' (yes, if you know that morning sickness actually confirms you that the bb is growing and doing well in your womb, you will sppreciate morning sickness), that kind of 'tian can jiao' or 'wu ying jiao' tt the bb gives in the womb and the moment when you meet him/her face to face... wow... really looking forward ley... waiting is always tough... but when it finally comes, the joy is tremendous!
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
back from malaysia
yoz i am back from malaysia!!!
well i must say it was supposed to be fun...
supposed to be la..
but somehow turned out not as expected...
mainly due to following reasons:
1) with the two little monkeys was indeed not easy!!! now i start to appreciate my church family... cuz with them around during church camp, the monkeys were like angels!!! cuz they helped me tame the monkeys... and when monkeys with familiar people, they more stable... My en was quite out of hand and rude during the trip esp in the last day... she showed me face and talked back to me rudely... she even asked the other tour member to give her sweet when she was offering her own son some snacks... i was so angry and embarressed about this.. when she got home, i lectured her and caned her on her palm, telling her firmly where was her mistake...
2) ok we did nnot bring enough money.. we didnt want to change too much rm... so turne out we were poor over there.. we never expected the meals there could be so expensive!!! a meal of mac dinner and a meal of 2 bowl wantan mee and a prata cost us 150rm in total! we nearly fainted!!! the classic joke here was we used up all our wet tissue and dry tissue! and last day after lunch when i needed to poo, i had no more tissue... and stupid msia restaurant toilet no toilet paper one... urrrrgggg.... so while pooing, i searched into my pouch and woo woo woo, thank God i had two USED tissues in there... phew... and ya, i used them to clean my butt.. what to do? i am not courageous enough to use kok's method.. (ya he used his hand last time when he encountered the same situ...)
that's not the end of the story... when i happily come out of the toilet, my gal said she needed to go too... so in we went... still happy that theres no crowd in the toilet when she suddenly said,'mama i need to dabian!' upon hearing that i was so sooo soooooo fused up!i sort of raised my voice said ,'how to dabian? y you want dabian? tao yan ley! no paper le la!!!' then there was an auntie past by (a stranger) and said (in fact sort of lecture),' y you scold her? kid want dabian let her da la! what you scold her for?' then she tucked me her well kept dabian paper wrapped in plastic bag...
i was so... so... ashame of myself and also embarressed and angry and... that really spoil my mood!!!! and guess what, i just found out that we could actually use our atm card to draw money there lor!!! STUPID!!!!
3) The food there was great (other than the first day meal)... but the time was short!!:( by the time i fed the kids, they were going back to the coach le!!! sad! i could only stuff whatever i could in my mouth and go...
4) the thing that made me really frustrated was, the itinarary of the trip... it was stupid especially the third day one... we were brought to visit strawberry farm and BOH tea plantation and bla bla bla then the last stop was cactus valley which when we reach there was about 2pm... we were told it would be free and easy time till 5.30pm when we would meet for dinner at nearby restaurant!! the guide told us that the pasar malam nearby would be opened around 4.30pm so we could go there see see walk walk... to me, in fact to most of us this arrangement was kind of silly cuz we had many young kids in our group!! the timing gap would be great if they could arrange us to go back to hotel for the kids to nap or what... but the guide said the hotel was too far and it would be meaningless to go back for less than an hour then come out again... then i requested if we could stay in coach to let the kids sleep but he said cant cuz the driver would be leaving the coach so it must be locked! thus the whole afternoon, four of us were in the cactus valley, under a tree, letting the kids sleep on our lap...so unglam and think people kinda gave us that kind of 'waliew' look... but wat to do? as parent (esp mummy) we couldnt care much... the children's well being is of priority!!!!
lesson learnt: if next time we are to go for family trip again, we will get more church people or more familiar people to go with us... and, free and easy might be better for us instead of package trip...
anyway, i still give thanks. i would say it was a nice experience for the children. they were very happy. and i personally love the strawberry resort hotel's room, though the climbing of steps were horrifying... esp with luggauages...
i would say if the trip was without the kids, it would be so much nicer for me.. but i think with the kids, though some bad encounter, i still enjoy myself! yeah :)
You can see the trip photo at facebook.
well i must say it was supposed to be fun...
supposed to be la..
but somehow turned out not as expected...
mainly due to following reasons:
1) with the two little monkeys was indeed not easy!!! now i start to appreciate my church family... cuz with them around during church camp, the monkeys were like angels!!! cuz they helped me tame the monkeys... and when monkeys with familiar people, they more stable... My en was quite out of hand and rude during the trip esp in the last day... she showed me face and talked back to me rudely... she even asked the other tour member to give her sweet when she was offering her own son some snacks... i was so angry and embarressed about this.. when she got home, i lectured her and caned her on her palm, telling her firmly where was her mistake...
2) ok we did nnot bring enough money.. we didnt want to change too much rm... so turne out we were poor over there.. we never expected the meals there could be so expensive!!! a meal of mac dinner and a meal of 2 bowl wantan mee and a prata cost us 150rm in total! we nearly fainted!!! the classic joke here was we used up all our wet tissue and dry tissue! and last day after lunch when i needed to poo, i had no more tissue... and stupid msia restaurant toilet no toilet paper one... urrrrgggg.... so while pooing, i searched into my pouch and woo woo woo, thank God i had two USED tissues in there... phew... and ya, i used them to clean my butt.. what to do? i am not courageous enough to use kok's method.. (ya he used his hand last time when he encountered the same situ...)
that's not the end of the story... when i happily come out of the toilet, my gal said she needed to go too... so in we went... still happy that theres no crowd in the toilet when she suddenly said,'mama i need to dabian!' upon hearing that i was so sooo soooooo fused up!i sort of raised my voice said ,'how to dabian? y you want dabian? tao yan ley! no paper le la!!!' then there was an auntie past by (a stranger) and said (in fact sort of lecture),' y you scold her? kid want dabian let her da la! what you scold her for?' then she tucked me her well kept dabian paper wrapped in plastic bag...
i was so... so... ashame of myself and also embarressed and angry and... that really spoil my mood!!!! and guess what, i just found out that we could actually use our atm card to draw money there lor!!! STUPID!!!!
3) The food there was great (other than the first day meal)... but the time was short!!:( by the time i fed the kids, they were going back to the coach le!!! sad! i could only stuff whatever i could in my mouth and go...
4) the thing that made me really frustrated was, the itinarary of the trip... it was stupid especially the third day one... we were brought to visit strawberry farm and BOH tea plantation and bla bla bla then the last stop was cactus valley which when we reach there was about 2pm... we were told it would be free and easy time till 5.30pm when we would meet for dinner at nearby restaurant!! the guide told us that the pasar malam nearby would be opened around 4.30pm so we could go there see see walk walk... to me, in fact to most of us this arrangement was kind of silly cuz we had many young kids in our group!! the timing gap would be great if they could arrange us to go back to hotel for the kids to nap or what... but the guide said the hotel was too far and it would be meaningless to go back for less than an hour then come out again... then i requested if we could stay in coach to let the kids sleep but he said cant cuz the driver would be leaving the coach so it must be locked! thus the whole afternoon, four of us were in the cactus valley, under a tree, letting the kids sleep on our lap...so unglam and think people kinda gave us that kind of 'waliew' look... but wat to do? as parent (esp mummy) we couldnt care much... the children's well being is of priority!!!!
lesson learnt: if next time we are to go for family trip again, we will get more church people or more familiar people to go with us... and, free and easy might be better for us instead of package trip...
anyway, i still give thanks. i would say it was a nice experience for the children. they were very happy. and i personally love the strawberry resort hotel's room, though the climbing of steps were horrifying... esp with luggauages...
i would say if the trip was without the kids, it would be so much nicer for me.. but i think with the kids, though some bad encounter, i still enjoy myself! yeah :)
You can see the trip photo at facebook.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Thank God
recently got friends around me get pregnant. and i believe more to come as i think i can smell the scent of babies arriving... hahaha...
i am very happy for them. really. of course, the news of their pregnancies somehow do remind me of my yongle... you know, if he is still hanging there, i could have been moving around with big tummies... ya 36 weeks big tunmmy... and most probably i wouldnt have participated in the camp so actively....oh ya, and not the mtv.... though during my first two pregnancies i did silly and crazy things too... like camp performance, adminstration, scuba diving, in charge of flag days, organised ec anniversary, etc etc... haha... initially i thought i could be admin to mer couple camp, do ruwa and attend camp with yongle... and i thought i would stay in one person room at east shore hospital... i thought i thought... well, all became dream... yet to come true, but not with yongle anymore... since he is with Jesus le...
I am really happy for my friends. I thank God for them and i remember to pray for them. I even get yongen to involve. i told her about their pregnancies and ask her to pray for the babies while i will pray for the mummies. i am happy for them.
today i heard a touching news from my another friend. she was told by one of the pregnant friend not to let me know abt her pregnancy. the reason is she is worried that i would be reminded of what had happen to me last nov... thank you friend for your love and sensitivity. ya i definitely will be reminded. but i love you to share with me your good news. and i love to pray for you and your baby.
Lord, please take care of the mummies and their babies. Please keep them safe and healthy. Let the babies be normal and may their mummies pregnancies are smooth and well. Lord, keep the devils away from them. Let your mighty armies protect them every min and sec. Thank you Lord. In Jesus name i pray, Amen!
i am very happy for them. really. of course, the news of their pregnancies somehow do remind me of my yongle... you know, if he is still hanging there, i could have been moving around with big tummies... ya 36 weeks big tunmmy... and most probably i wouldnt have participated in the camp so actively....oh ya, and not the mtv.... though during my first two pregnancies i did silly and crazy things too... like camp performance, adminstration, scuba diving, in charge of flag days, organised ec anniversary, etc etc... haha... initially i thought i could be admin to mer couple camp, do ruwa and attend camp with yongle... and i thought i would stay in one person room at east shore hospital... i thought i thought... well, all became dream... yet to come true, but not with yongle anymore... since he is with Jesus le...
I am really happy for my friends. I thank God for them and i remember to pray for them. I even get yongen to involve. i told her about their pregnancies and ask her to pray for the babies while i will pray for the mummies. i am happy for them.
today i heard a touching news from my another friend. she was told by one of the pregnant friend not to let me know abt her pregnancy. the reason is she is worried that i would be reminded of what had happen to me last nov... thank you friend for your love and sensitivity. ya i definitely will be reminded. but i love you to share with me your good news. and i love to pray for you and your baby.
Lord, please take care of the mummies and their babies. Please keep them safe and healthy. Let the babies be normal and may their mummies pregnancies are smooth and well. Lord, keep the devils away from them. Let your mighty armies protect them every min and sec. Thank you Lord. In Jesus name i pray, Amen!
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Monday, May 11, 2009
mtv
yesterday was a hectic day for me (and my church mates...) but it was definitely fun and meaningful!
after the church camp, many still remember the camp dance... so wendy suggested to make a mtv for the church camp dvd, with the photos in there... so that members can purchase the dvd...
so yesterday was the shooting. at first i thought it would be a simple an hour or so production... so were many cute bros who were being 'recruited' on the spot for the shooting. 'i thought i just need to do the 'oooooo', swinging my arms that's all in the toilet!' they said... hahaha... but our great famous talented producer cum director didnt think so... her idea was obviously more than what we had imagined!!!
we danced at differents places. toilet (yes, with the brush and mop), hall, carpark, wharehouse unloading area... (wanted to go for grass patch, but didnt)... we did many silly pose and dances, other than the standard dance steps of the camp dance....(oh ya, dirty dancing, sexy dancing, violent dancing, ah lian beng bouncing, and fishball silly visa dance... hahaha), the cool shoulder exercises (with the qian bian look, aiqin and huihui were so pro in that) according to the rythm when the lead do the solo silly dance (yuntian the funniest), and the what i call gorillas arm hang and shake (think shuiting did the best... hmm... but i still think shuilin look more like the jumpy gorri)... and more more more
the whole shooting took us more than 3, near 4 hours! everyone was soooooo tired by then... but we were so happy and pleased to participate in the shooting... everyone of us had very good laughing exercise while shooting and watching what we had done... laughed till we drop!!! really drop!
thanks to wendy who came out with this great idea of producing this dvd... thanks for everyone's hardwork. God knows your willing heart! and i thank God for my wonderful, precious, lovely, funny, dearest bros and sis.... muak love you all!!!
after the church camp, many still remember the camp dance... so wendy suggested to make a mtv for the church camp dvd, with the photos in there... so that members can purchase the dvd...
so yesterday was the shooting. at first i thought it would be a simple an hour or so production... so were many cute bros who were being 'recruited' on the spot for the shooting. 'i thought i just need to do the 'oooooo', swinging my arms that's all in the toilet!' they said... hahaha... but our great famous talented producer cum director didnt think so... her idea was obviously more than what we had imagined!!!
we danced at differents places. toilet (yes, with the brush and mop), hall, carpark, wharehouse unloading area... (wanted to go for grass patch, but didnt)... we did many silly pose and dances, other than the standard dance steps of the camp dance....(oh ya, dirty dancing, sexy dancing, violent dancing, ah lian beng bouncing, and fishball silly visa dance... hahaha), the cool shoulder exercises (with the qian bian look, aiqin and huihui were so pro in that) according to the rythm when the lead do the solo silly dance (yuntian the funniest), and the what i call gorillas arm hang and shake (think shuiting did the best... hmm... but i still think shuilin look more like the jumpy gorri)... and more more more
the whole shooting took us more than 3, near 4 hours! everyone was soooooo tired by then... but we were so happy and pleased to participate in the shooting... everyone of us had very good laughing exercise while shooting and watching what we had done... laughed till we drop!!! really drop!
thanks to wendy who came out with this great idea of producing this dvd... thanks for everyone's hardwork. God knows your willing heart! and i thank God for my wonderful, precious, lovely, funny, dearest bros and sis.... muak love you all!!!
nowdays student's chinese standard...
this post is copied from my sis's blog. so funny so i thought should share with you all...
现在的小孩子，造句一点也不认真...
1、题目：一边……一边……
小朋友写：他一边脱衣服，一边穿裤子。
老师批语：他到底是要脱还是要穿啊？
2、题目：其中
小朋友写：我的其中一只左脚受伤了。
老师批语：你是蜈蚣吗？
3、题目：陆陆续续
小朋友写：下班了，爸爸陆陆续续的回家了。
老师批语：你到底有几个爸爸呀？
4、题目：难过
小朋友写：我家门前有条水沟很难过。
老师批语：老师更难过。
5、题目：又……又……
小朋友写：我的妈妈又矮又高又胖又瘦。
老师批语；你的妈妈 是变形金钢吗？
6、题目：你看
小朋友写：你看什么看！没看过啊
老师批语：没看过
7、题目：欣欣向荣
小朋友写：欣欣向荣荣告白。
老师批语：连续剧不要看太多了！
8、题目：好吃
小朋友写：好吃个屁。
老师批语：有些东西是不能吃的。
9、题目：天真
小朋友写：今天真热。
老师批语：你真天真。
10、题目：果然
小朋友写：昨天我吃水果，然后喝凉水。
老师批语：是词组，不能分开的。
11、题目：先……再……，例题：先吃饭，再冼澡。
小朋友写：先生，再见！
老师批语：想像力超过了地球人的智慧。
12、题目：况且
小朋友写：一列火车经过，况且况且况且况且况且况
老师批语：我死了算了
现在的小孩子，造句一点也不认真...
1、题目：一边……一边……
小朋友写：他一边脱衣服，一边穿裤子。
老师批语：他到底是要脱还是要穿啊？
2、题目：其中
小朋友写：我的其中一只左脚受伤了。
老师批语：你是蜈蚣吗？
3、题目：陆陆续续
小朋友写：下班了，爸爸陆陆续续的回家了。
老师批语：你到底有几个爸爸呀？
4、题目：难过
小朋友写：我家门前有条水沟很难过。
老师批语：老师更难过。
5、题目：又……又……
小朋友写：我的妈妈又矮又高又胖又瘦。
老师批语；你的妈妈 是变形金钢吗？
6、题目：你看
小朋友写：你看什么看！没看过啊
老师批语：没看过
7、题目：欣欣向荣
小朋友写：欣欣向荣荣告白。
老师批语：连续剧不要看太多了！
8、题目：好吃
小朋友写：好吃个屁。
老师批语：有些东西是不能吃的。
9、题目：天真
小朋友写：今天真热。
老师批语：你真天真。
10、题目：果然
小朋友写：昨天我吃水果，然后喝凉水。
老师批语：是词组，不能分开的。
11、题目：先……再……，例题：先吃饭，再冼澡。
小朋友写：先生，再见！
老师批语：想像力超过了地球人的智慧。
12、题目：况且
小朋友写：一列火车经过，况且况且况且况且况且况
老师批语：我死了算了
Friday, May 8, 2009
yongqi long bia
1 may to 3 may, our whole family went melaka for church camp. the place is a kampong setting. the kids love the place very much. i was in charge of the program running. thus many sisters and brothers were helping me here and there to attend and entertain them. this is what i call family camp. i really thank God for every single of them. at first i thought of not bringing them, or just bring qi, to the camp as both were unwell few days before we set off. granny was still very worried of their well being and kept asking me not to bring them... at the end when she knew that qi was having fever, she even asked me not to go... but i told her i was in charge of program so i die die also have to go... Thank God, when they got there, they are all well and good... till now!!!
this morning as usual, i brought the kids to the void deck to wait for en's school bus. they were playing catch while waiting. after en boarded her bus, qi wanted to continue play catch with me. thus he ran very fast away from me... and the bad thing was, he ran with his head turned backward looking at me... he was running very fast... then i realised he was abt to hit a pillar. i called him and he turned... BANG!!! he hitted his forehead against the edge of the pillar. the impact was so hard that he literally bounced from the pillar onto the floor... OUCH! it was painfuli thought... and yes it was... and the worst thing i never thought of was, he started to bleed... then i realised he had a small but deep vertical cut at the center right of his forehead... Gosh! i panicked like what... i immediately used my palm to press hard on the wound to stop further bleeding... then i run around the void deck, asking myself what should i do... (yongqi pooed before he went downstair somemore lor... i thought should i bring him home to clean the poo first or what..) but the very thing i remember was, i prayed. asking my Lord to heal and cover him with His precious blood (oh ya, he already covered with blood actually, his own blood...) i carried him to my doorstep, realised that the bleeding was still quite bad, so i dashed down the stair again.. hailed a cab and off the changi hospital...
i really thank the cad driver who sent us to the hospital... i was so panicky and qi's face was covered with so much blood.. with palm still pressing on the wound, i kept talking to qi, making sure that he was conscious and responsive... he was ok... but looked tired.. i guess he was shocked. seeing this, the driver suggested us to go changi hospital instead of kk (kk and east shore were my list of hospital to go at that moment...) and when we reached there, he refused to receive payment. he asked me to quickly send the boy to the emergency clinic... really thank him so much. may God bless this malay driver abundantly...
at the hospital, yongi did not shed a tear. he was so quiet... the doc and nurses were so amazed by him.. they kept praising him that he is brave. even when they need to glue the wound (i was asked to choose stitching or glueing... to avoid going back to the hospital to remove the stitch, i chose glueing... but i have to be careful not to let him rub the wound and keep it out of water for 5 days), they put stick a gauze on the eyes to prevent the glue from getting into the eyes, he was calm and steady... at the same time, there was a lady who was in the same room receiving treatment from knee and palm injury (resulted from fall), she was making hissing noise when receiving treatment... haha... my boy so brave...
the doctor said that qi needs to be monitored for a few hours... in case any vomiting or high fever or other abnormal behavior. he needs to be rushed into the hospital... In Jesus' name, i claim that he will be ok!
as the cut is a vertical cut, doc said there will be a scar on the forehead in future... hahaha... guess what my respond was.. i said its ok, he is a boy, that will enhance his machoness!!!kekeke this reminded me of zhihao... when he git hurt on his forehead, i told him the same thing!!! then he asked me why not i purposely cut yongqi to enhance his machoness.... i told him of course i wont do that purposely la.... so HEY CHIN ZHIHAO, NOW MY BOY ALSo GOT THE SAME CUT AS YOU ALMOST AT THE SAME PLACE LOR... AND I AM OK WITH THE SCAR... HE LOOKS SO MACHO WITH IT!!!! kekeke...
this morning as usual, i brought the kids to the void deck to wait for en's school bus. they were playing catch while waiting. after en boarded her bus, qi wanted to continue play catch with me. thus he ran very fast away from me... and the bad thing was, he ran with his head turned backward looking at me... he was running very fast... then i realised he was abt to hit a pillar. i called him and he turned... BANG!!! he hitted his forehead against the edge of the pillar. the impact was so hard that he literally bounced from the pillar onto the floor... OUCH! it was painfuli thought... and yes it was... and the worst thing i never thought of was, he started to bleed... then i realised he had a small but deep vertical cut at the center right of his forehead... Gosh! i panicked like what... i immediately used my palm to press hard on the wound to stop further bleeding... then i run around the void deck, asking myself what should i do... (yongqi pooed before he went downstair somemore lor... i thought should i bring him home to clean the poo first or what..) but the very thing i remember was, i prayed. asking my Lord to heal and cover him with His precious blood (oh ya, he already covered with blood actually, his own blood...) i carried him to my doorstep, realised that the bleeding was still quite bad, so i dashed down the stair again.. hailed a cab and off the changi hospital...
i really thank the cad driver who sent us to the hospital... i was so panicky and qi's face was covered with so much blood.. with palm still pressing on the wound, i kept talking to qi, making sure that he was conscious and responsive... he was ok... but looked tired.. i guess he was shocked. seeing this, the driver suggested us to go changi hospital instead of kk (kk and east shore were my list of hospital to go at that moment...) and when we reached there, he refused to receive payment. he asked me to quickly send the boy to the emergency clinic... really thank him so much. may God bless this malay driver abundantly...
at the hospital, yongi did not shed a tear. he was so quiet... the doc and nurses were so amazed by him.. they kept praising him that he is brave. even when they need to glue the wound (i was asked to choose stitching or glueing... to avoid going back to the hospital to remove the stitch, i chose glueing... but i have to be careful not to let him rub the wound and keep it out of water for 5 days), they put stick a gauze on the eyes to prevent the glue from getting into the eyes, he was calm and steady... at the same time, there was a lady who was in the same room receiving treatment from knee and palm injury (resulted from fall), she was making hissing noise when receiving treatment... haha... my boy so brave...
the doctor said that qi needs to be monitored for a few hours... in case any vomiting or high fever or other abnormal behavior. he needs to be rushed into the hospital... In Jesus' name, i claim that he will be ok!
as the cut is a vertical cut, doc said there will be a scar on the forehead in future... hahaha... guess what my respond was.. i said its ok, he is a boy, that will enhance his machoness!!!kekeke this reminded me of zhihao... when he git hurt on his forehead, i told him the same thing!!! then he asked me why not i purposely cut yongqi to enhance his machoness.... i told him of course i wont do that purposely la.... so HEY CHIN ZHIHAO, NOW MY BOY ALSo GOT THE SAME CUT AS YOU ALMOST AT THE SAME PLACE LOR... AND I AM OK WITH THE SCAR... HE LOOKS SO MACHO WITH IT!!!! kekeke...
Monday, April 27, 2009
when i get old
saw this poem from my sis's blog. very touching so steal it for you.
<当我老了>
当我老了, 不再是原来的我,
请理解我, 对我有一点耐心.
当我把菜汤洒到自己的衣服上时,
当我忘记怎样系鞋带时,
请想一想当初我是如何手把手地教你.
当我一遍又一遍地重复你早已听腻的话语,
请耐心地听我说, 不要打断我.
你小的时候, 我不得不重复那个讲过千百遍的故事,
直到你进入梦乡.
当我需要你帮我洗澡时, 请不要责备我,
还记得小时候我千方百计哄你洗澡的情形吗?
当我对新科技和新事物不知所措时, 请不要嘲笑我,
想一想当初我怎样耐心地回答你的每一个"为什么".
当我由于双腿疲劳而无法行走时,
请伸出你年轻有力的手扶持我,
就象你小时候学习走路时, 我扶你那样.
当我突然忘记我们谈话的主题,
请给我一些时间让我回想.
其实对我来说, 谈论什么并不重要,
只要你能在一旁听我说, 我就很满足.
当你看着老去的我, 请不要悲伤.
理解我, 支持我. 就象你刚开始学习
如何生活时我对你那样.
当初我引导你走上人生的路
如今请陪伴我走完最后的路
给我你的爱和耐心, 我会报以感恩的微笑,
这微笑中凝结着我对你无限的爱..
<当我老了>
当我老了, 不再是原来的我,
请理解我, 对我有一点耐心.
当我把菜汤洒到自己的衣服上时,
当我忘记怎样系鞋带时,
请想一想当初我是如何手把手地教你.
当我一遍又一遍地重复你早已听腻的话语,
请耐心地听我说, 不要打断我.
你小的时候, 我不得不重复那个讲过千百遍的故事,
直到你进入梦乡.
当我需要你帮我洗澡时, 请不要责备我,
还记得小时候我千方百计哄你洗澡的情形吗?
当我对新科技和新事物不知所措时, 请不要嘲笑我,
想一想当初我怎样耐心地回答你的每一个"为什么".
当我由于双腿疲劳而无法行走时,
请伸出你年轻有力的手扶持我,
就象你小时候学习走路时, 我扶你那样.
当我突然忘记我们谈话的主题,
请给我一些时间让我回想.
其实对我来说, 谈论什么并不重要,
只要你能在一旁听我说, 我就很满足.
当你看着老去的我, 请不要悲伤.
理解我, 支持我. 就象你刚开始学习
如何生活时我对你那样.
当初我引导你走上人生的路
如今请陪伴我走完最后的路
给我你的爱和耐心, 我会报以感恩的微笑,
这微笑中凝结着我对你无限的爱..
niam niam cham
today is a super hot day... 4 more days, i am heading to malacca for church camp. allie and i are the program ic.... we spent alot of time past few days preparing stuffs at the church...
while yongen was recovering from few days fever and cough, my dad in law 'kidnapped' her on thursday to his place. and good thing he did that, i brought yongqi to church to do some stuff without worrying en would have not enough rest....
my mum in law, after knowing that en had fever, she said that weather has not been very good so asked me not to bring the two fellows to the church camp.... thus, initial plan was i was to send the two kids to her before i set off on coming thursday....
over the last weekend, as i still had outstanding stuffs to do at church, yongqi was also sent to granny's house on saturday morning. both kids returned last night. yongqi had mild couging and experienced high temperature at 2am... his temperature is still on and off till this moment.
my mum in law called this morning. she told me she could help me take care of en but not qi... she said i need to bring qi with me to the camp. she said qi was sooooo rowdy and naughty over the weekend that the 'shushu' couldnt stand him... she said that little fellow had been screaming, throwing things around and knocking onto doors with toys... shushu was so frustrated that he threw away all qi's toy...
:( poor qi! at that moment, i dared not tell her that qi has fever....in case she nagged again,'church so important... everytime church.... never take care of your family, etc etc etc...' and last time whenever she said that i would laughingly said, ' yalor very important!'
i think i will let qi tag by my side more often... but that means, no more partoh time for me and hubby le... and ouch! we have planned june trip havent we?!?! sh*t! i dun want stay in singapore this june!!!!!!! any samaritan around help to take care of qi?!?!?! plzzzzzzz :_( sob sob...
just now brought the kids to ica to collect their new passport. the weather was soooo hot that i think it made me feel goggy.... qi, alr feverish, was soooo sleepy and so was en. i wanted so much to reach home asap at that moment... hey guess what? i missed my stop in bus no. 28! ya i took that from interchange. stupid right? i was sooo angry with myself that i was cursing and swearing while i crossed to the opposite side to take another bus back again....
there are simply tooooo much things in my mind... and i am starting to worry abt qi's fever snd cough.... am sooo worry that it would affect the camp.... worry worry worry... what to do? the only thing i can do is, pray pray pray lor... haiz!
while yongen was recovering from few days fever and cough, my dad in law 'kidnapped' her on thursday to his place. and good thing he did that, i brought yongqi to church to do some stuff without worrying en would have not enough rest....
my mum in law, after knowing that en had fever, she said that weather has not been very good so asked me not to bring the two fellows to the church camp.... thus, initial plan was i was to send the two kids to her before i set off on coming thursday....
over the last weekend, as i still had outstanding stuffs to do at church, yongqi was also sent to granny's house on saturday morning. both kids returned last night. yongqi had mild couging and experienced high temperature at 2am... his temperature is still on and off till this moment.
my mum in law called this morning. she told me she could help me take care of en but not qi... she said i need to bring qi with me to the camp. she said qi was sooooo rowdy and naughty over the weekend that the 'shushu' couldnt stand him... she said that little fellow had been screaming, throwing things around and knocking onto doors with toys... shushu was so frustrated that he threw away all qi's toy...
:( poor qi! at that moment, i dared not tell her that qi has fever....in case she nagged again,'church so important... everytime church.... never take care of your family, etc etc etc...' and last time whenever she said that i would laughingly said, ' yalor very important!'
i think i will let qi tag by my side more often... but that means, no more partoh time for me and hubby le... and ouch! we have planned june trip havent we?!?! sh*t! i dun want stay in singapore this june!!!!!!! any samaritan around help to take care of qi?!?!?! plzzzzzzz :_( sob sob...
just now brought the kids to ica to collect their new passport. the weather was soooo hot that i think it made me feel goggy.... qi, alr feverish, was soooo sleepy and so was en. i wanted so much to reach home asap at that moment... hey guess what? i missed my stop in bus no. 28! ya i took that from interchange. stupid right? i was sooo angry with myself that i was cursing and swearing while i crossed to the opposite side to take another bus back again....
there are simply tooooo much things in my mind... and i am starting to worry abt qi's fever snd cough.... am sooo worry that it would affect the camp.... worry worry worry... what to do? the only thing i can do is, pray pray pray lor... haiz!
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
fredo died
my pet turtle passed away this evening... so sudden... i was soo shocked!
it died with open eyes, slanted head, in the pool of water...
at first i thought it was sleeping or resting in the midst of eating..
i remember this afternoon i saw its head near the rock, i still tap on the tank to make sure it is ok... and ya it was. it still hid its head when it felt the tapping...
just now i did the same thing. realised it was not reacting. so i took it out of the tank. it still gave the same look.. listless opened eyes.. then i touched its head gently (normally when i touched its head it would have hidden it) and there was no reaction.. i called out its name... nothing. i shook it gently, nil... i shook harder and even upside down, still frozen. finally i put it under running tap, still the same!!!! ok, announce dead!
i was sooo upset. shocked too... i bought fredo at my neighbourhood pet shop with $4.50. i bought it cuz i have had much fish food stock and a mini guppies tank at home. i thought i should utilise them, at least let the turtle finish the food... but then it went into depression not long after. it refused to eat. i thought it was too lonely, so i decided to buy a play mate to keep it company. while paying for my fredy (my another pet turtle)with $4.50, i was told that turtles like fredo and fredy do not take the fish food that i had at home. so i got to buy the real food for turtle. and cuz now i have two turtles, thought the guppies tank would be too cramp for them, so i bought another turtle tank! imagine my hubby's reaction....
that was not the worst. the craziest part was, fredo still didnt look or behave better... i read up books abt turtle and it told me that i need to seperate both of them, in case fredo's sickness were to spread to fredy. and guess what, i also got to know that turtles do not need to live in a group. meaning, they dun care if they are lonely or not!!! ok i also searched the web on fredo's behavior and that was when i finally decided that i should bring it to the vet. i thought it could be interesting since i never visited a vet b4 and my kids could also be exposed to the vet... plus i am curious how the vet would treat a turtle and also, i couldnt bear to see fredo die under my care...
ya, we took a cab to and fro serangoon where the pet that treat turtle is. that costed me about $20! the vet gave fredo anti biotic and vitamins injection on its both side buttock. and i was asked to do the same for the next 5 days to fredo... Gosh, me do it!!!! and ya, i did it!!!! an experience indeed... reminded me of my childhood dream to be a vet... and when i injected fredo, i told myself i am a vet... haha... and the consultaion fees is $65. fredo was diagnosed with pneumonia... vet told me it would have low survival rate...
it was challenging for me to take care of fredo. i kept believing it would recover. and in fact it did! it started eating after 1 and half month.. it ate alot and resume its activeness... i was so happy and when i told yongen that fredo had started eating, she was very happy too...
perhaps, i have taken things for granted. thought that ut had recovered so the standard of attending my pets had dropped especially recently i was busy with camp stuff... plus no sun light these few days...
when i told yongen fredo died, she was shocked and i was hysterical. she simply replied ok and went off.. then yongqi came to kaypo see what happen... when i told yongqi that fredo had died, to my surprise, he said,'bu yao jin' (never mind) gently, as if he was consoling me... hey, i'm.... speechless! thought i should be the one consoling them, explaining to them about death... thought yongen should be the one consoling me.... thought thought thought....
i'm SPEECHLESS
it died with open eyes, slanted head, in the pool of water...
at first i thought it was sleeping or resting in the midst of eating..
i remember this afternoon i saw its head near the rock, i still tap on the tank to make sure it is ok... and ya it was. it still hid its head when it felt the tapping...
just now i did the same thing. realised it was not reacting. so i took it out of the tank. it still gave the same look.. listless opened eyes.. then i touched its head gently (normally when i touched its head it would have hidden it) and there was no reaction.. i called out its name... nothing. i shook it gently, nil... i shook harder and even upside down, still frozen. finally i put it under running tap, still the same!!!! ok, announce dead!
i was sooo upset. shocked too... i bought fredo at my neighbourhood pet shop with $4.50. i bought it cuz i have had much fish food stock and a mini guppies tank at home. i thought i should utilise them, at least let the turtle finish the food... but then it went into depression not long after. it refused to eat. i thought it was too lonely, so i decided to buy a play mate to keep it company. while paying for my fredy (my another pet turtle)with $4.50, i was told that turtles like fredo and fredy do not take the fish food that i had at home. so i got to buy the real food for turtle. and cuz now i have two turtles, thought the guppies tank would be too cramp for them, so i bought another turtle tank! imagine my hubby's reaction....
that was not the worst. the craziest part was, fredo still didnt look or behave better... i read up books abt turtle and it told me that i need to seperate both of them, in case fredo's sickness were to spread to fredy. and guess what, i also got to know that turtles do not need to live in a group. meaning, they dun care if they are lonely or not!!! ok i also searched the web on fredo's behavior and that was when i finally decided that i should bring it to the vet. i thought it could be interesting since i never visited a vet b4 and my kids could also be exposed to the vet... plus i am curious how the vet would treat a turtle and also, i couldnt bear to see fredo die under my care...
ya, we took a cab to and fro serangoon where the pet that treat turtle is. that costed me about $20! the vet gave fredo anti biotic and vitamins injection on its both side buttock. and i was asked to do the same for the next 5 days to fredo... Gosh, me do it!!!! and ya, i did it!!!! an experience indeed... reminded me of my childhood dream to be a vet... and when i injected fredo, i told myself i am a vet... haha... and the consultaion fees is $65. fredo was diagnosed with pneumonia... vet told me it would have low survival rate...
it was challenging for me to take care of fredo. i kept believing it would recover. and in fact it did! it started eating after 1 and half month.. it ate alot and resume its activeness... i was so happy and when i told yongen that fredo had started eating, she was very happy too...
perhaps, i have taken things for granted. thought that ut had recovered so the standard of attending my pets had dropped especially recently i was busy with camp stuff... plus no sun light these few days...
when i told yongen fredo died, she was shocked and i was hysterical. she simply replied ok and went off.. then yongqi came to kaypo see what happen... when i told yongqi that fredo had died, to my surprise, he said,'bu yao jin' (never mind) gently, as if he was consoling me... hey, i'm.... speechless! thought i should be the one consoling them, explaining to them about death... thought yongen should be the one consoling me.... thought thought thought....
i'm SPEECHLESS
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
lecture from Yongen
long time no see aunty mensy finally visited me last sunday. and she is torturing me heavily. on second day she ate up 4 to 5 piece of roti and 2 lollypops! and now in her third day of stay, she still eating hungrily!!!! what to do???? her hunger is expected! the worst thing is, last night, as if she was not torturing me enough, i cut the flesh of my thumb while chopping garlic when preparing dinner... en told me today, i should be careful next time. i told her i was very careful. then she said i should open my eyes bigger, using finger to strtch her eyelids, i did the same, telling her i was opening my eyes real big! then finally she said, because you never pray to Jesus before you chop the garlic... ya, i didnt. and i should be praying to Jesus whatever i want to do.... lesson learnt. Thanks en.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
haiz haiz haiz
haiz, yongqi is coughing again... his cough.. is like once a month, very regular... so much more regular than my menses lor!!!! whenever he starts to cough, it will be very troublesome.. if not taken care of, his cough will easily become bronchitis. then it will be tough for me to handle... most of the time, i will complain, stress and curse and swear...
this time, his cough is quite sudden outburst one... he was still ok the previous night, yet the next morning his cough got very bad. he was coughing sooooo badly that he hardly slept last night. but one thing good, he is still as naughty and active like he normally behaves... hahaha... its only when the child gets sick, i will appreciate and miss his/her activness and naughty.
last night i was watching the london weight management program. suddenly i have an urge to go back to my london weight package and continue with my 'jian fei' plan. for those who didnt know, i signed up for a package with London weight. After 2 sessions, my weight reduced about 3kg. but before i went for my 3rd session, i tested myself with pregnancy kit and realised i was pregnant. Thus my package was put on hold. my initial plan was to go back again after i give birth. who knows... and now, my plan is still the same. i will go back after i give birth to my next child.
The scene of treatmnt, reminded me the day i found out my pregnancy. that kind of excitment and happiness... i hope i will experience them again soon. haha... in fact, i dreamt i get pregnant again last night. hahaha...
this time, his cough is quite sudden outburst one... he was still ok the previous night, yet the next morning his cough got very bad. he was coughing sooooo badly that he hardly slept last night. but one thing good, he is still as naughty and active like he normally behaves... hahaha... its only when the child gets sick, i will appreciate and miss his/her activness and naughty.
last night i was watching the london weight management program. suddenly i have an urge to go back to my london weight package and continue with my 'jian fei' plan. for those who didnt know, i signed up for a package with London weight. After 2 sessions, my weight reduced about 3kg. but before i went for my 3rd session, i tested myself with pregnancy kit and realised i was pregnant. Thus my package was put on hold. my initial plan was to go back again after i give birth. who knows... and now, my plan is still the same. i will go back after i give birth to my next child.
The scene of treatmnt, reminded me the day i found out my pregnancy. that kind of excitment and happiness... i hope i will experience them again soon. haha... in fact, i dreamt i get pregnant again last night. hahaha...
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Thanks giving
10 april was Good Friday. I mentioned in my blog that a cousin of mine is acting in a skit in the church. guess what? my friend who supposed to act as her mum had a rashes outbreak on 4 days before the actual performance, which was monday, thus i was asked to takeover the role.
4 days away from the actual thing.. that is to say, we have less than 4 days to practise... hmm this is challenging! i gladly agreed to help cuz acting is my passion.
my cousin came to my place the next two days to practise. and on thursday, the whole team of us stayed over at church to rehearse till 3am. i could still remember joi's stressful face (she was the director of the skit) and my cousin's anxious and guilty face (it was her first time acting on stage for so many audiences and she had difficulty in getting to her role)...
the skit that we were to put up was actually quite sad story. but i think i have a comical face whereby i do not know why the moment i stepped on stage i heard sooooo much laughter... to an extend, i have to really controlled hard not to laugh too... thank God i did not laugh or the whole thing will be ruined.
Praise Lord, the whole thing turned out good. at least i heard no negative but all positive comment. and many said my cousin acted well.. in fact she did... The Holy Spirit has definitely worked in us... even our little 7 yrs old weiteng acted well.. heard that the skit did earn quite a number of tear drop... hahaha...
thank God for everything, really. and also, i would like to give thanks for my wonderful children. i went to the gynae last thursday for my annual check up. the gynae said that my d&c was well performed thus my womb has recovered perfectly. however, i had experienced irregular menses, in fact it was a all along thing... and eversince the D&C last nov, i have not had my menses yet. this is not a good sign as i am anxious to conceive my third child...
the gynae told me i am super lucky to have two children with my condition like that... she said most people who have crazy homones that lead to irrugular menses like mine would have difficulty to conceive... and this is exactly what i know all along even before i got married.. i remember before i married i ever told my hubby about my condition and asked him what should we do if i am unable to conceive... he actually told me we could go for adoption.. (we really seriously thought and talked about this issue before) but by God's Grace, i have two beautiful and wonderful children. that's why yong en's name means to praise God's grace.. this made me realised i have forgotten that my children are by grace, gifts from God... how could i?!?!
i really want to give thanks to my Lord...
Thanks HIM for my wonderful children...
though the gynae once again proves that its difficult for me to conceive,
i still believe God is in control!!!
Thank you Lord,
Amen!
4 days away from the actual thing.. that is to say, we have less than 4 days to practise... hmm this is challenging! i gladly agreed to help cuz acting is my passion.
my cousin came to my place the next two days to practise. and on thursday, the whole team of us stayed over at church to rehearse till 3am. i could still remember joi's stressful face (she was the director of the skit) and my cousin's anxious and guilty face (it was her first time acting on stage for so many audiences and she had difficulty in getting to her role)...
the skit that we were to put up was actually quite sad story. but i think i have a comical face whereby i do not know why the moment i stepped on stage i heard sooooo much laughter... to an extend, i have to really controlled hard not to laugh too... thank God i did not laugh or the whole thing will be ruined.
Praise Lord, the whole thing turned out good. at least i heard no negative but all positive comment. and many said my cousin acted well.. in fact she did... The Holy Spirit has definitely worked in us... even our little 7 yrs old weiteng acted well.. heard that the skit did earn quite a number of tear drop... hahaha...
thank God for everything, really. and also, i would like to give thanks for my wonderful children. i went to the gynae last thursday for my annual check up. the gynae said that my d&c was well performed thus my womb has recovered perfectly. however, i had experienced irregular menses, in fact it was a all along thing... and eversince the D&C last nov, i have not had my menses yet. this is not a good sign as i am anxious to conceive my third child...
the gynae told me i am super lucky to have two children with my condition like that... she said most people who have crazy homones that lead to irrugular menses like mine would have difficulty to conceive... and this is exactly what i know all along even before i got married.. i remember before i married i ever told my hubby about my condition and asked him what should we do if i am unable to conceive... he actually told me we could go for adoption.. (we really seriously thought and talked about this issue before) but by God's Grace, i have two beautiful and wonderful children. that's why yong en's name means to praise God's grace.. this made me realised i have forgotten that my children are by grace, gifts from God... how could i?!?!
i really want to give thanks to my Lord...
Thanks HIM for my wonderful children...
though the gynae once again proves that its difficult for me to conceive,
i still believe God is in control!!!
Thank you Lord,
Amen!
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
i wish?!?!
really thank jiayu for telling me that she has been reading my blog. this encourages me, really, make me somehow feel that i am listened and heard...
i know that working will definitely make me busier and makes days easier to pass... sometime i wish that i am working in the bank, for good pay and attracyive bonus. sometime i wish i am working in a student care, for job satisfaction as i have worked in that field before and though it was a job which i never wanted to go into last time, it is the best job that has given me most satisfaction so far... especially when i saw how needy students' lives being changed. sometime i wish i am working in the child care or kindergarten, for i think i may be able to do a good job (hee... looking at how much i can 'manipulate' my children within my fingertips... hehehe). but i know that, if any of the above wishes come true, i will think that i prefer to stay with my kids, accompany them to walk thru their childhood, to grow with them...
i know that i cant be stagnant for all times.. i need to improve and upgrade myself. sometimes i wish i could attend a degree course, to complete my dream and to prove to others that i am not stupid. sometimes i wish to take up diploma in early childhood, to know more about ways to handle young children. sometimes i wish to enhance my knowledge in special learning area, to be able to help those slow learners. sometime i wish i could take up family life education, to help needy families. but i know that i have no money, no availability and capability...
i know that an interest would definitely make me healthier and more confident. sometimes i wish i could join an acting group, to put up more show and performances on stage to satisfy my hunger to be under the spotlight (sound vain, but i am a 'stage person' i love stage). sometimes i wish i could sign up belly dancing or hip hop or folk dance or any dances classes, to dance and let my hair down, as well as shape up my body. sometimes i wish i could i wish i could...but i know i have everlasting wishes that will never be satisfied...
maybe i should be contented with my current lifestyle. morning prepare en to school, then play, teach, tell story or take a walk with qi, watch morning tv (old tcs or even sbc series show), prepare lunch (porridge, rice, noodle..) feed kids, help en with homework, nap them, go online (harvest my farm town), chat online with jasmine, read or nap a while, watch kids program, prepare dinner, feed kids, clean up, shower kids, prepare them to bed, tv and online again, sleep...
i am happy in fact with this simple 'tai tai' life. especially when my kids show me how much they enjoy my companionship. and i would say this is the best thing that keep me from regretting my decision to stay at home.
occasionally, when people from outside, like my old friends, classmates, etc, appear and start talking abt 'foreign' stuffs, i will feel depressed, asking myself what am i doing... i have such reaction because last time i always wanted to be a career woman, a woman who is of high rank in work area with many subordinates, a woman who has high income, drives, quality life, etc etc... soo far from where i am now... and my friends know that i have such dream and they think i would be so 'in future' last time. so now, when they sort of see me staying at home, they couldn't believe it... plus, i find myself more and more ah soh... haiz...
ok, jiayu mention my own life... i do have too especially friday. friday is the day when i send my kids to in law. the day i would let down my hair to go havoc... past weeks i had been to library, browsing thru cook book, terrapins books, family education book and kids managment book. i been to salon too for good hair scrub and cut (will do so again for treatment). i had window shopped. and had been thinking to watch a movie but did not... and coming friday, i am going clubbing at timbre.... but whenever i thought of my poor hubby alone at home, i bit guilty... cuz he works so hard for the family, and finally he decides to put aside work loads every friday to relax, he is left alone at home... sometimes i will spend the friday night with him too. but then, it would be simple dinner and tv or dvd at home. the most luxury is movie with pop corns... but only when there are good movie.
the best is sat morning. recent two sat dw and i went out for morning cycling. from where i stay to pasir ris mac for breakfast, then to the beach along the mangrove to watch the crabs, mud skippers, etc. i treasure the moment. really.
then sat noon will be spent in church for parents group, a group which family educator, mdm carol, will talk on healthy parenthood. after then we will need to fetch our children from in law again. (sometimes if i have more program, dw will do the fetching himself but most time he will complete only half of his mission... en will bully him by not wanting to go home.
sunday morning is church time again. after church, dw will bring the kids home while i stay for my 'cca' (dance training or coffee with my church friends).
ya. thats how i spend my dayssssss... maybe some of you will envy, maybe some of you will sigh... haha... but this is my decision. ya my decision...
i know that working will definitely make me busier and makes days easier to pass... sometime i wish that i am working in the bank, for good pay and attracyive bonus. sometime i wish i am working in a student care, for job satisfaction as i have worked in that field before and though it was a job which i never wanted to go into last time, it is the best job that has given me most satisfaction so far... especially when i saw how needy students' lives being changed. sometime i wish i am working in the child care or kindergarten, for i think i may be able to do a good job (hee... looking at how much i can 'manipulate' my children within my fingertips... hehehe). but i know that, if any of the above wishes come true, i will think that i prefer to stay with my kids, accompany them to walk thru their childhood, to grow with them...
i know that i cant be stagnant for all times.. i need to improve and upgrade myself. sometimes i wish i could attend a degree course, to complete my dream and to prove to others that i am not stupid. sometimes i wish to take up diploma in early childhood, to know more about ways to handle young children. sometimes i wish to enhance my knowledge in special learning area, to be able to help those slow learners. sometime i wish i could take up family life education, to help needy families. but i know that i have no money, no availability and capability...
i know that an interest would definitely make me healthier and more confident. sometimes i wish i could join an acting group, to put up more show and performances on stage to satisfy my hunger to be under the spotlight (sound vain, but i am a 'stage person' i love stage). sometimes i wish i could sign up belly dancing or hip hop or folk dance or any dances classes, to dance and let my hair down, as well as shape up my body. sometimes i wish i could i wish i could...but i know i have everlasting wishes that will never be satisfied...
maybe i should be contented with my current lifestyle. morning prepare en to school, then play, teach, tell story or take a walk with qi, watch morning tv (old tcs or even sbc series show), prepare lunch (porridge, rice, noodle..) feed kids, help en with homework, nap them, go online (harvest my farm town), chat online with jasmine, read or nap a while, watch kids program, prepare dinner, feed kids, clean up, shower kids, prepare them to bed, tv and online again, sleep...
i am happy in fact with this simple 'tai tai' life. especially when my kids show me how much they enjoy my companionship. and i would say this is the best thing that keep me from regretting my decision to stay at home.
occasionally, when people from outside, like my old friends, classmates, etc, appear and start talking abt 'foreign' stuffs, i will feel depressed, asking myself what am i doing... i have such reaction because last time i always wanted to be a career woman, a woman who is of high rank in work area with many subordinates, a woman who has high income, drives, quality life, etc etc... soo far from where i am now... and my friends know that i have such dream and they think i would be so 'in future' last time. so now, when they sort of see me staying at home, they couldn't believe it... plus, i find myself more and more ah soh... haiz...
ok, jiayu mention my own life... i do have too especially friday. friday is the day when i send my kids to in law. the day i would let down my hair to go havoc... past weeks i had been to library, browsing thru cook book, terrapins books, family education book and kids managment book. i been to salon too for good hair scrub and cut (will do so again for treatment). i had window shopped. and had been thinking to watch a movie but did not... and coming friday, i am going clubbing at timbre.... but whenever i thought of my poor hubby alone at home, i bit guilty... cuz he works so hard for the family, and finally he decides to put aside work loads every friday to relax, he is left alone at home... sometimes i will spend the friday night with him too. but then, it would be simple dinner and tv or dvd at home. the most luxury is movie with pop corns... but only when there are good movie.
the best is sat morning. recent two sat dw and i went out for morning cycling. from where i stay to pasir ris mac for breakfast, then to the beach along the mangrove to watch the crabs, mud skippers, etc. i treasure the moment. really.
then sat noon will be spent in church for parents group, a group which family educator, mdm carol, will talk on healthy parenthood. after then we will need to fetch our children from in law again. (sometimes if i have more program, dw will do the fetching himself but most time he will complete only half of his mission... en will bully him by not wanting to go home.
sunday morning is church time again. after church, dw will bring the kids home while i stay for my 'cca' (dance training or coffee with my church friends).
ya. thats how i spend my dayssssss... maybe some of you will envy, maybe some of you will sigh... haha... but this is my decision. ya my decision...
Monday, April 6, 2009
ACHIEVEMENTS
i thank God for a wonderful night sleep last night. it was good because none of my children came into our room to disturb us. some, in fact, most of the nights, they would take turn to come in to our room, either to attempt to co-sleep with us on our bed, or trying their luck to see if they could get a bottle of milk by making whinning noise... (of course, in order to stop those actions from becoming their habits, we, most of the time me as dw needs to work the next day, will either threaten to cane them, or drag them back to their room and stay there for a while...
last night, it was sooooo peaceful. i remember i sleep till i drooled and snored like what...
this morning the children were very well behaved too. yongen woke up at 645am, asking for milk while yongqi did the same thing at about 7am. after milk, yongen brushed her teeth and washed her face, all by herself. then she changed into her uniform, again all by herself. later then she wore her sock and shoes without giving me any problem. hmm... i like it when my gal does everything herself. she has learnt to be very independant. nowadays, she even shower herself. i will only do a last check to ensure she is clean from dirt stain and soap.
yongqi has achievement too. out of 26 alphabets, he has recognised 14! that is to say, 12 more to go... and with brief intro to numbers, i think he is now able to recognise 2, 5, 7, 8 and 9. hey, i only taught him once from 1 to 9 for about few minutes! he is learning fast! same goes with the alphabets, i only officially introduced A B C E O S the rest G K L M N R T W, he caught them by himself while he points and sing the ABC song, as well as from the playhouse disney's word world and sesame street.
talking about the 'word world', this program has made my gal very interested in spelling. she would try to memorise the spelling of words she sees. now she is able to spell simple words like cat dog pet rat net ball etc wow, i am so proud of my children!
last night, it was sooooo peaceful. i remember i sleep till i drooled and snored like what...
this morning the children were very well behaved too. yongen woke up at 645am, asking for milk while yongqi did the same thing at about 7am. after milk, yongen brushed her teeth and washed her face, all by herself. then she changed into her uniform, again all by herself. later then she wore her sock and shoes without giving me any problem. hmm... i like it when my gal does everything herself. she has learnt to be very independant. nowadays, she even shower herself. i will only do a last check to ensure she is clean from dirt stain and soap.
yongqi has achievement too. out of 26 alphabets, he has recognised 14! that is to say, 12 more to go... and with brief intro to numbers, i think he is now able to recognise 2, 5, 7, 8 and 9. hey, i only taught him once from 1 to 9 for about few minutes! he is learning fast! same goes with the alphabets, i only officially introduced A B C E O S the rest G K L M N R T W, he caught them by himself while he points and sing the ABC song, as well as from the playhouse disney's word world and sesame street.
talking about the 'word world', this program has made my gal very interested in spelling. she would try to memorise the spelling of words she sees. now she is able to spell simple words like cat dog pet rat net ball etc wow, i am so proud of my children!
Sunday, April 5, 2009
tough 3 months ahead
my cousin will be acting in a simple skit presented by my church for the Good Friday event. She stayed back for some video recording today. but there was a problem. in the scene they were taking today, she was supposed to cry but she couldnt. i wanted to help her so i brought her to a corner, told her to nurture her saddness and tears. my intention to teach her how to cry, resulted me in rolling tears..
i cried, because the setting was good (you know good dark little corner). most importantly, those tears were long kept.. sooo deeply hidden in me, has been looking for a way to squeeze them out...
starting april, it will be a tough 3 months ahead. the toughest should be in june... end of june....i never understand this could be so tough... last time a sister in Christ share with me how she wanted a holiday at the peak of the toughness, i couldnt understand why she needed to do so... but now, when i am experiencing it myself, i want to do the same.
last sat, i brought this to dw, telling him i want to go for a holiday end of june. with much effort, i managed to 'squeeze' out my reason, and of course resulted with teary eyes... but i hid them well... i guess he did not see them...
i really hope that by God's grace, this thing can end. and only God's miracle can put a full stop to it. But God seems to want me to walk through this thing...
i cried, because the setting was good (you know good dark little corner). most importantly, those tears were long kept.. sooo deeply hidden in me, has been looking for a way to squeeze them out...
starting april, it will be a tough 3 months ahead. the toughest should be in june... end of june....i never understand this could be so tough... last time a sister in Christ share with me how she wanted a holiday at the peak of the toughness, i couldnt understand why she needed to do so... but now, when i am experiencing it myself, i want to do the same.
last sat, i brought this to dw, telling him i want to go for a holiday end of june. with much effort, i managed to 'squeeze' out my reason, and of course resulted with teary eyes... but i hid them well... i guess he did not see them...
i really hope that by God's grace, this thing can end. and only God's miracle can put a full stop to it. But God seems to want me to walk through this thing...
Saturday, April 4, 2009
煮 妇 心 声
我 该 怎 么 说， 我 该 怎 么 写 呢？ 此 刻 的 我 情 感 泛 滥， 心 境 复 杂， 有 许 许 多 多 的 话 语 想 倾 诉， 但 是 缺 少 知 音。。
刚 刚 与 三 个 中 学 同 学 聚 会 回 来。 认 识 我 的 人 都 知 道 我 以 前 是 不 喜 欢 出 席 之 类 的 聚 会 的。 因 为 觉 得 大 家 总 是 在 暗 地 里 比 较 来 比 较 去， 而 自 己 往 往 是 那 个 输 的 很 惨 的。 没 有 会 员 卡， 没 有 高 收 入， 没 有 高 档 的 职 业 称 呼。。。 什 么 都 没 有。
可 能 是 年 龄 渐 增 和 有 了 家 庭 孩 子 的 关 系， 自 己 在 不 知 觉 中 不 再 排 斥 这 样 的 聚 会， 反 而 开 始 怀 念 老 同 学， 想 找 机 会 彼 此update 一 下。 于 是， 今 天 便 高 兴 地 与 三 位 老 友 聚 了 聚。。。
或 许 是 大 家 都 成 熟 了， 已 看 透 了 所 谓 的 身 份、 名 利， 彼 此 的 比 较 少 了 很 多， 甚 至可 说 几 乎 没 有（ 若 我 不 是 过 度 单 纯 地 一 方 面 相 信 大 家 的 真 诚）。 不 过， 由 于 事 面 广 了， 事 业 也 多 少 稳 了， 大 家 的 话 题、 品 味 也 不 再 依 旧 了。
当 他 们 讨 论 着 刚 游 香 港 的 经 历 和 计 划 下 一 站 到 日 本 的 假 期， 以 及 要 托 付 彼 此 买 这 买 那 时， 我 发 现 自 己 脱 节 了。 香 港？ 去 过 一 次， 那 是1998 年 的 事。 天 啊，11 年 前！ 日 本？ 我 想 都 不 敢 想。 听 说 那 里 的 东 西 超 贵， 而 且 去 也 只 是 购 物 吧。。。 我 不 是 很 喜 欢 购 物。
接 着， 她 们 决 定 闲 逛 一 下。 进 的 是 我 没 听 过 的 名 牌 服 装 店， 看 的 是 某 品 牌 的 高 级 化 妆 品。 我 那 时 开 始 觉 得 自 己 格 格 不 入， 象 是 从 乡 村 去 到 城 市。 朋 友 察 觉 了 我 的 别 扭， 企 图 与 我 对 话， 开 始 用“ 煮 妇” 的 言 语 与 我 沟 通， 问 我 孩 子 喜 欢 什 么 玩 具； 通 常 在 哪 里 用 餐； 买 菜 去 哪 里 买 等。。。 顿 时 心 里 觉 得 怪 怪， 真 是 无 法 形 容。
天 啊， 突 然 觉 得 自 己 好 糟 糕。 自 己 真 的 变 成 煮 饭 婆 了？ 我 真 的 就 这 样 裹 足 不 前、 变 成 了 山 瑞 的 亲 戚， 山 龟 了？
朋 友 当 中 有 已 婚 的。 当 她 们 分 享 了 自 己 的 日 本 计 划 和 香 港 的 旅 行 经 历， 然 后 问 我 带 过 孩 子 到 哪 里 旅 行 时， 我 心 里 开 始 产 生 了 内 疚 的' 比 较'。 可 是 我 要 埋 怨 吗？ 自 己 既 然 选 择 了 呆 在 家 里 好 好 地 栽 培 孩 子， 选 择 了 以 生 养 众 多 为 满 足， 那 就 不 应 该 比 较， 不 是 吗？ 但， 我 还 是 人 呀！
虽 然 此 刻 心 情 还 是 不 平 衡， 可 是 毕 竟 是 自 己 选 择 的 道 路。 一 切 都 是 自 己 选 择 的， 所 以 必 须 知 足。 也 许， 知 足 长 乐 的 这 个 啊Q 精 神 也 是 一 门 值 得 学 习 的 学 问！
刚 刚 与 三 个 中 学 同 学 聚 会 回 来。 认 识 我 的 人 都 知 道 我 以 前 是 不 喜 欢 出 席 之 类 的 聚 会 的。 因 为 觉 得 大 家 总 是 在 暗 地 里 比 较 来 比 较 去， 而 自 己 往 往 是 那 个 输 的 很 惨 的。 没 有 会 员 卡， 没 有 高 收 入， 没 有 高 档 的 职 业 称 呼。。。 什 么 都 没 有。
可 能 是 年 龄 渐 增 和 有 了 家 庭 孩 子 的 关 系， 自 己 在 不 知 觉 中 不 再 排 斥 这 样 的 聚 会， 反 而 开 始 怀 念 老 同 学， 想 找 机 会 彼 此update 一 下。 于 是， 今 天 便 高 兴 地 与 三 位 老 友 聚 了 聚。。。
或 许 是 大 家 都 成 熟 了， 已 看 透 了 所 谓 的 身 份、 名 利， 彼 此 的 比 较 少 了 很 多， 甚 至可 说 几 乎 没 有（ 若 我 不 是 过 度 单 纯 地 一 方 面 相 信 大 家 的 真 诚）。 不 过， 由 于 事 面 广 了， 事 业 也 多 少 稳 了， 大 家 的 话 题、 品 味 也 不 再 依 旧 了。
当 他 们 讨 论 着 刚 游 香 港 的 经 历 和 计 划 下 一 站 到 日 本 的 假 期， 以 及 要 托 付 彼 此 买 这 买 那 时， 我 发 现 自 己 脱 节 了。 香 港？ 去 过 一 次， 那 是1998 年 的 事。 天 啊，11 年 前！ 日 本？ 我 想 都 不 敢 想。 听 说 那 里 的 东 西 超 贵， 而 且 去 也 只 是 购 物 吧。。。 我 不 是 很 喜 欢 购 物。
接 着， 她 们 决 定 闲 逛 一 下。 进 的 是 我 没 听 过 的 名 牌 服 装 店， 看 的 是 某 品 牌 的 高 级 化 妆 品。 我 那 时 开 始 觉 得 自 己 格 格 不 入， 象 是 从 乡 村 去 到 城 市。 朋 友 察 觉 了 我 的 别 扭， 企 图 与 我 对 话， 开 始 用“ 煮 妇” 的 言 语 与 我 沟 通， 问 我 孩 子 喜 欢 什 么 玩 具； 通 常 在 哪 里 用 餐； 买 菜 去 哪 里 买 等。。。 顿 时 心 里 觉 得 怪 怪， 真 是 无 法 形 容。
天 啊， 突 然 觉 得 自 己 好 糟 糕。 自 己 真 的 变 成 煮 饭 婆 了？ 我 真 的 就 这 样 裹 足 不 前、 变 成 了 山 瑞 的 亲 戚， 山 龟 了？
朋 友 当 中 有 已 婚 的。 当 她 们 分 享 了 自 己 的 日 本 计 划 和 香 港 的 旅 行 经 历， 然 后 问 我 带 过 孩 子 到 哪 里 旅 行 时， 我 心 里 开 始 产 生 了 内 疚 的' 比 较'。 可 是 我 要 埋 怨 吗？ 自 己 既 然 选 择 了 呆 在 家 里 好 好 地 栽 培 孩 子， 选 择 了 以 生 养 众 多 为 满 足， 那 就 不 应 该 比 较， 不 是 吗？ 但， 我 还 是 人 呀！
虽 然 此 刻 心 情 还 是 不 平 衡， 可 是 毕 竟 是 自 己 选 择 的 道 路。 一 切 都 是 自 己 选 择 的， 所 以 必 须 知 足。 也 许， 知 足 长 乐 的 这 个 啊Q 精 神 也 是 一 门 值 得 学 习 的 学 问！
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
sweet dream
last night i dreamt myself delivered a baby (looks like a boy). But then i was feeling odd cuz i was not intending to breastfeed him. (hey, i want to breastfeed all my children!)
It was a sweet dream. i hope it will come true soon.
wonder why did i have such dream... was it cuz too much thinking in the day? could it be due to my 'mental alarm for due date'? or (hopefully is) God is telling me this day has come....
i was teasing yongqi yesterday when he kept asking for 'nei nei'. i put him into breastfeed position, tell him 'nei nei' is here... haha... teasing him and telling him how he drank from me last time... so daily activity made me have such dream?
dw and i want to have a new born in 2009. thus, if you calculate the date, i must conceive latest march 09 in order to realise this 'dream'. and today is last day of march. maybe the dream was due to my 'mental alarm of the date due'...
lastly, could it be a prophetic dream from God telling us baby on the way? hehe... let's hope so...
this third baby is definitely special to me and my family. on his arrival, you people who read this blog must come visit me at hospital and share my joy! and i am going to get a single room stay so that all of you can have a party in there... hahaha...
dream dream dream... may the dream be realised soon... Amen!
It was a sweet dream. i hope it will come true soon.
wonder why did i have such dream... was it cuz too much thinking in the day? could it be due to my 'mental alarm for due date'? or (hopefully is) God is telling me this day has come....
i was teasing yongqi yesterday when he kept asking for 'nei nei'. i put him into breastfeed position, tell him 'nei nei' is here... haha... teasing him and telling him how he drank from me last time... so daily activity made me have such dream?
dw and i want to have a new born in 2009. thus, if you calculate the date, i must conceive latest march 09 in order to realise this 'dream'. and today is last day of march. maybe the dream was due to my 'mental alarm of the date due'...
lastly, could it be a prophetic dream from God telling us baby on the way? hehe... let's hope so...
this third baby is definitely special to me and my family. on his arrival, you people who read this blog must come visit me at hospital and share my joy! and i am going to get a single room stay so that all of you can have a party in there... hahaha...
dream dream dream... may the dream be realised soon... Amen!
Sunday, March 29, 2009
"EMO" too?
Today is sunday, sabbath day. i attended church with my hubby and kids. the worship part is not that bad. at least the kids did not bug me like previous weeks. i could not attend the sermon part. as yongqi refuse to let his precious mummy off. so i was in the sunday school with my dear son...everything seemed ok... until lunch time. i just blew ouyt of sudden when my kids got distracted by the cake displayed on the dining table, started to refuse their lunch...
after then, we had a short cell meeting to settle some admin matters and bried recap on sermon. looking at Yuxin, Jiafu and Huilan;s little fellow, i started to have deep but beyond my understanding thoughts. (sound ridiculous?) She is soooo cute!
I signed up for tambourine course at church. as my vision for my worship leading is to do so with tambourine. thus i love to get the hang of this weapon of GOD. Some sisters from other church joined us. among them, one is a two months pregnant young lady. not knowing why, i just cant get my attention off her... how i envy her...
why am i going thru all these? why am i like this? i dun know. but i really must thank God for my two pretty children. God is good enough to me i would say. but maybe deep in me, i want more children...
recently have the thought of wanting more than 3 kids... perhaps 4 or 5. but dw said that is too tight for singapore family, especially for single breadwinner family. i agree.. but hey i have a sister in Christ who has 6 children ley... hehehe... i think i am getting more and more hungry for having another child...
one resolution i want to make now. i am to be a pretty and happy expecting mummy if i am to get pregnant. my previous two expecting experiences were horrible. Grumpy, sloppy and angry... till people around me all scared of me.
Really my Lord, please give me another child. but the most important of all, my God, let the pregnancy be smooth and successful, and the baby be healthy and normal. In Jesus name, Amen!
(what i have gone thru made me somehow understand how couples without kids feel. I am now so burdened to pray for them.)
after then, we had a short cell meeting to settle some admin matters and bried recap on sermon. looking at Yuxin, Jiafu and Huilan;s little fellow, i started to have deep but beyond my understanding thoughts. (sound ridiculous?) She is soooo cute!
I signed up for tambourine course at church. as my vision for my worship leading is to do so with tambourine. thus i love to get the hang of this weapon of GOD. Some sisters from other church joined us. among them, one is a two months pregnant young lady. not knowing why, i just cant get my attention off her... how i envy her...
why am i going thru all these? why am i like this? i dun know. but i really must thank God for my two pretty children. God is good enough to me i would say. but maybe deep in me, i want more children...
recently have the thought of wanting more than 3 kids... perhaps 4 or 5. but dw said that is too tight for singapore family, especially for single breadwinner family. i agree.. but hey i have a sister in Christ who has 6 children ley... hehehe... i think i am getting more and more hungry for having another child...
one resolution i want to make now. i am to be a pretty and happy expecting mummy if i am to get pregnant. my previous two expecting experiences were horrible. Grumpy, sloppy and angry... till people around me all scared of me.
Really my Lord, please give me another child. but the most important of all, my God, let the pregnancy be smooth and successful, and the baby be healthy and normal. In Jesus name, Amen!
(what i have gone thru made me somehow understand how couples without kids feel. I am now so burdened to pray for them.)
Friday, March 27, 2009
Yongle Found in Heaven...
最 近 教 会 姐 妹 赠 送 了 一 本 “Jesse Found in Heaven” 的 书 籍。 作 者 是 一 个 曾 经 流 产 的 母 亲。 事 隔 多 年 后， 她 偶 然 在 一 本 书 籍 里 读 到 原 来 每 一 个 流 产 、 被 堕 或 死 去的 胎 儿 在 天 父 那 里， 正 等 待 与 母 亲 相 聚。 之 后， 她 自 己 在 异 象 中 也 看 见 了 自 己 失 去 的 儿 子 站 在 耶 稣 的 旁 边。 主 要 她 将 自 己 的 经 历 记 录 下 来， 好 鼓 励 其 他 和 她 一 样 失 去 骨 肉 的 妇 女。
我 想 这 本 书 多 多 少 少 帮 助 了 我， 虽 然 我 在 之 前 已 经 知 道 失 去 的 孩 子 已 在 主 那 里 了。 但 是， 它 却 让 我 不 再 隐 藏 心 里 的 悲 伤。。。
自 从 去 年 十 一 月 十 九 日 失 去 胎 儿 后， 我 告 诉 自 己 主 所 做 的 每 一 件 事 都 是 好 的。 我 不 允 许 我 自 己 陷 入 自 怜 或 悲 伤 当 中。 我 在 手 术 后 的 第 而 天 便 外 出， 第 五 天 就 往 马 国 跑， 一 周 后 就 去 渡 假 屋 渡 假， 也 顺 便 庆 祝 自 己 的 生 日。 一 连 串 的 忙 碌， 或 许 是 自 己 在 逃 避、 麻 醉 自 己， 好 让 自 己 不 好 再 去 想 这 件 事。 我 告 诉 自 己， 神 很 快， 在 今 年 里， 就 会 再 赐 我 另 一 个 孩 子。。。 说 不 定， 他 会 将 永 乐 还 给 我。。。
如 今4 个 月 过 去 了。 我 的 月 经 一 直 没 有 回 来。 迹 象 也 显 示 我 似 乎 没 有 排 卵。 但 是 我 不 愿 失 去 每 一 个 百 分 之 点 一 的 可 能 性。 我 几 乎 每 一 个 月 都 验 尿， 当 然， 结 果 都 是 令 人 失 望 的。
就 这 样， 安 慰 自 己， 盼 望， 失 望。 安 慰 自 己， 盼 望， 失 望。。。 一 个 月， 一 个 月， 又 一 个 月。。
另 一 方 面， 手 机 里 头 的reminder alarm 一 直 提 醒 自 己 若 是 永 乐 还 在 他 已 是 多 大 的 胎 儿。 让 我 不 禁 非 常 挂 念 胎 儿。 算 算， 永 乐 的 预 产 期 其 实 会 靠 近 我 的 结 婚 周 年。 若 他 健 在， 他 便 是 我 俩 今 年 结 婚 周 年 最 好 的 礼 物。
看 了 “Jesse found in heaven” 后， 以 下 是 我 的 祷 告：
主 啊
听 说 永 乐 在 祢 那 里。
祢 会 帮 我 照 顾 他，
直 到 我 见 祢 面 时，
祢 会 把 他 还 给 我。。。
主 啊
请 代 我 传 话。
帮 我 告 诉 永 乐 妈 妈 很 爱 他，
也 很 想 念 他。
我 盼 望 早 日 与 他 重 逢，
把 他 紧 抱 在 怀 中，
大 力 亲 吻 他，
全 心 保 护 他。。。
只 是 在 地 上，
他 还 有 咏 恩 姐 姐
和 勇 齐 哥 哥。
他 们 都 需 要 我。
若 我 走 了 离 开 他 们，
地 上 就 没 有 比 我 更 适 合 的 人 选 来 做 他 们 的 妈 妈 了。
因 为 对 在 地 上 的 孩 子 来 说，
妈 妈 是 重 要 的。
而 他， 我 的 小 永 乐，
有 耶 稣 和 天 使 疼 惜。
那 肯 定 比 我 的 照 料 更 加 好。
因 此，
我 想 我 还 是 在 地 上 照 顾 咏 恩 和 勇 齐，
同 时 带 着 盼 望 期 待 的 心，
等 我 在 地 上 的 日 子 满 了，
回 到 天 家 时，
才 与 他， 我 的 永 乐，
团 聚。
主 啊，
求 祢 再 对 他 说 一 句，
“妈 妈 好 爱 你！”
我 想 这 本 书 多 多 少 少 帮 助 了 我， 虽 然 我 在 之 前 已 经 知 道 失 去 的 孩 子 已 在 主 那 里 了。 但 是， 它 却 让 我 不 再 隐 藏 心 里 的 悲 伤。。。
自 从 去 年 十 一 月 十 九 日 失 去 胎 儿 后， 我 告 诉 自 己 主 所 做 的 每 一 件 事 都 是 好 的。 我 不 允 许 我 自 己 陷 入 自 怜 或 悲 伤 当 中。 我 在 手 术 后 的 第 而 天 便 外 出， 第 五 天 就 往 马 国 跑， 一 周 后 就 去 渡 假 屋 渡 假， 也 顺 便 庆 祝 自 己 的 生 日。 一 连 串 的 忙 碌， 或 许 是 自 己 在 逃 避、 麻 醉 自 己， 好 让 自 己 不 好 再 去 想 这 件 事。 我 告 诉 自 己， 神 很 快， 在 今 年 里， 就 会 再 赐 我 另 一 个 孩 子。。。 说 不 定， 他 会 将 永 乐 还 给 我。。。
如 今4 个 月 过 去 了。 我 的 月 经 一 直 没 有 回 来。 迹 象 也 显 示 我 似 乎 没 有 排 卵。 但 是 我 不 愿 失 去 每 一 个 百 分 之 点 一 的 可 能 性。 我 几 乎 每 一 个 月 都 验 尿， 当 然， 结 果 都 是 令 人 失 望 的。
就 这 样， 安 慰 自 己， 盼 望， 失 望。 安 慰 自 己， 盼 望， 失 望。。。 一 个 月， 一 个 月， 又 一 个 月。。
另 一 方 面， 手 机 里 头 的reminder alarm 一 直 提 醒 自 己 若 是 永 乐 还 在 他 已 是 多 大 的 胎 儿。 让 我 不 禁 非 常 挂 念 胎 儿。 算 算， 永 乐 的 预 产 期 其 实 会 靠 近 我 的 结 婚 周 年。 若 他 健 在， 他 便 是 我 俩 今 年 结 婚 周 年 最 好 的 礼 物。
看 了 “Jesse found in heaven” 后， 以 下 是 我 的 祷 告：
主 啊
听 说 永 乐 在 祢 那 里。
祢 会 帮 我 照 顾 他，
直 到 我 见 祢 面 时，
祢 会 把 他 还 给 我。。。
主 啊
请 代 我 传 话。
帮 我 告 诉 永 乐 妈 妈 很 爱 他，
也 很 想 念 他。
我 盼 望 早 日 与 他 重 逢，
把 他 紧 抱 在 怀 中，
大 力 亲 吻 他，
全 心 保 护 他。。。
只 是 在 地 上，
他 还 有 咏 恩 姐 姐
和 勇 齐 哥 哥。
他 们 都 需 要 我。
若 我 走 了 离 开 他 们，
地 上 就 没 有 比 我 更 适 合 的 人 选 来 做 他 们 的 妈 妈 了。
因 为 对 在 地 上 的 孩 子 来 说，
妈 妈 是 重 要 的。
而 他， 我 的 小 永 乐，
有 耶 稣 和 天 使 疼 惜。
那 肯 定 比 我 的 照 料 更 加 好。
因 此，
我 想 我 还 是 在 地 上 照 顾 咏 恩 和 勇 齐，
同 时 带 着 盼 望 期 待 的 心，
等 我 在 地 上 的 日 子 满 了，
回 到 天 家 时，
才 与 他， 我 的 永 乐，
团 聚。
主 啊，
求 祢 再 对 他 说 一 句，
“妈 妈 好 爱 你！”
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Heart of Worship
i am looking for the heart of worship....
i am looking for my heart when i do...
cuz without the heart, my worship is worthless...
Monday, March 2, 2009
misses
here i'm back again...
been very tired recently, not knowing y...
did my pregnancy test today... negative! quite disappointed. i thought it would be positive....
yongen has been coughing badly since last thursday. yet today she still went to school cuz it was a field trip to the musuem. think exhibition is abt olden days fashion.
talking abt olden days... i always miss my childhood days... borrowed a book abt olden singapore from the library. it as got man pics and interesting facts... it reminds me last time we used to call carbonated drink as 'pop chwee' hahaha...
and it showed a pic of an indian man tugging a cow to street selling fresh milk!Wow, fresh indeed huh? hahaha...
i love to go back to my childhood environment. i really do. i miss those flats, trees, even smell and noise.. of course my beloved grandma, her smile and her voice... but everything is gone. the person and the buildings.. everything. i regretted not taking enough pic of the buildings and environment...
time really flies. grandma left me in 1997, ie 12 years ago!!! wow! it seems like yesterday when i was still playing by her side... if she is still around, she would be 83. and if only she still around, she would see dongwei, witness my wedding and see my children... if she is still around, she would have accepted Jesus... (rather, would i knoW Jesus if grandma is still around? )
FEEL LIKE TALKING TO HER ONCE AGAIN
FEEL LIKE SINGING TO HER
FEEL LIKE TEASING HER
SO THAT I COULD SEE HER SMILE AGAIN.
FORGOT TO HOLD HER WHEN SHE WAS WITH ME
FORGOT TO KISS HER
FORGOT TO SAY HOW MUCH I LOVE HER
UNTIL SHE STAY NO LONGER WITH ME.
IN MY HEART I PRAY
I PRAY IN MY HEART
THE ONLY WAY I COULD EVER SEE HER AGAIN
IS WHEN MY MERCY LORD ALLOWS
TREASURE WHAT YOU HAVE
GIVE THANKS WHENEVER YOU CAN
FORGIVE WHOSOEVER
CUZ ONE DAY YOU WILL MISS ONE ANOTHER
sadness... perhaps due to my disappointment... perhaps due to my loneliness... perhaps due to her death anniversary approaching.. perhaps, no perhaps, just feel so...
been very tired recently, not knowing y...
did my pregnancy test today... negative! quite disappointed. i thought it would be positive....
yongen has been coughing badly since last thursday. yet today she still went to school cuz it was a field trip to the musuem. think exhibition is abt olden days fashion.
talking abt olden days... i always miss my childhood days... borrowed a book abt olden singapore from the library. it as got man pics and interesting facts... it reminds me last time we used to call carbonated drink as 'pop chwee' hahaha...
and it showed a pic of an indian man tugging a cow to street selling fresh milk!Wow, fresh indeed huh? hahaha...
i love to go back to my childhood environment. i really do. i miss those flats, trees, even smell and noise.. of course my beloved grandma, her smile and her voice... but everything is gone. the person and the buildings.. everything. i regretted not taking enough pic of the buildings and environment...
time really flies. grandma left me in 1997, ie 12 years ago!!! wow! it seems like yesterday when i was still playing by her side... if she is still around, she would be 83. and if only she still around, she would see dongwei, witness my wedding and see my children... if she is still around, she would have accepted Jesus... (rather, would i knoW Jesus if grandma is still around? )
FEEL LIKE TALKING TO HER ONCE AGAIN
FEEL LIKE SINGING TO HER
FEEL LIKE TEASING HER
SO THAT I COULD SEE HER SMILE AGAIN.
FORGOT TO HOLD HER WHEN SHE WAS WITH ME
FORGOT TO KISS HER
FORGOT TO SAY HOW MUCH I LOVE HER
UNTIL SHE STAY NO LONGER WITH ME.
IN MY HEART I PRAY
I PRAY IN MY HEART
THE ONLY WAY I COULD EVER SEE HER AGAIN
IS WHEN MY MERCY LORD ALLOWS
TREASURE WHAT YOU HAVE
GIVE THANKS WHENEVER YOU CAN
FORGIVE WHOSOEVER
CUZ ONE DAY YOU WILL MISS ONE ANOTHER
sadness... perhaps due to my disappointment... perhaps due to my loneliness... perhaps due to her death anniversary approaching.. perhaps, no perhaps, just feel so...
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Gift from JESUS
Read my sis’s posting on her blog. Was rather touched and sad. Cuz I felt the same years ago and I could understand her feeling. I was too, holding grudges toward the same person mentioned in her blog. But the Lord, changed me. Was still remember how I was crying to the Lord, asking Him to help me love him more….
Since I come to know Jesus, He has given me two greatest of all gifts, ie. LOVE and HOPE.
He gave me strength to forgive and love the person whom I hated most in my life. HE make me love him so much that I want to do things that please him. And I realized that, he is also a victim of the darkness, which he himself doesn’t know. I feel sad for him, really.
Another gift is HOPE. I remember 12 years ago when my beloved grandma passed away, I was so depressed. I was so upset that I would not be able to see my grandma again. Last November, I lost my fetus, but I was hopeful, cuz I know that one day when I get to meet Jesus, HE will return the fetus to me… well, who knows, maybe my Lord will return him to me even before I meet HIM! I believe, nothing is impossible to HIM! AMEN.
During Chinese new year visitation, I teared too without anyone knowing. I teared when I saw my uncle lying on the mattress, looking so weak and helpless and sick. He was the uncle who took care of me with my grandma when I was young, the uncle who doted me, served me like a princess when I was young. When I attempted to woke him from his sleep, wanting to ask yongen to address him ‘ lao chek’ , I felt the pinch in my heart. It was so heartache…just like my poem… ‘the young one will grow old, the old one will go weak…’
I thank God. Really thank HIM. Cuz shuilin and shuiting have turned to the Lord. And now they have grown up. Both are doing well in their own areas. At least, I have done my best to what I have promised my ah ma, to take care of them. The only one who still left me worried is their brother. Lord, please help this boy to come to YOU!
Since I come to know Jesus, He has given me two greatest of all gifts, ie. LOVE and HOPE.
He gave me strength to forgive and love the person whom I hated most in my life. HE make me love him so much that I want to do things that please him. And I realized that, he is also a victim of the darkness, which he himself doesn’t know. I feel sad for him, really.
Another gift is HOPE. I remember 12 years ago when my beloved grandma passed away, I was so depressed. I was so upset that I would not be able to see my grandma again. Last November, I lost my fetus, but I was hopeful, cuz I know that one day when I get to meet Jesus, HE will return the fetus to me… well, who knows, maybe my Lord will return him to me even before I meet HIM! I believe, nothing is impossible to HIM! AMEN.
During Chinese new year visitation, I teared too without anyone knowing. I teared when I saw my uncle lying on the mattress, looking so weak and helpless and sick. He was the uncle who took care of me with my grandma when I was young, the uncle who doted me, served me like a princess when I was young. When I attempted to woke him from his sleep, wanting to ask yongen to address him ‘ lao chek’ , I felt the pinch in my heart. It was so heartache…just like my poem… ‘the young one will grow old, the old one will go weak…’
I thank God. Really thank HIM. Cuz shuilin and shuiting have turned to the Lord. And now they have grown up. Both are doing well in their own areas. At least, I have done my best to what I have promised my ah ma, to take care of them. The only one who still left me worried is their brother. Lord, please help this boy to come to YOU!
Saturday, January 24, 2009
blog is revived!
hahaha... my sis set up her blog recently, tempting me to imply cpr to my blog and finally it is revived!
It has been so long since i last wrote here... I am writing in English now cuz my chinese program is encounting some problem. I am unable to activate it once i am online.. eeeeerrr..... so do bear with my english standard huh...
chinese new year is 2 days away from now. I am always excited like a kid for this season. i remembered myself crying in front of my mum at the end of the cny when i was 19 or 20 year old! omg!!!!
time really flies. i am now mother of 2 fellow, 5 yrs and 3 yrs (base on yr... hehe... makan sia as they both are yr end babies) i was pregnant with my third child last sep. unfortunately the foetus did not pull through. i had a miscarriage on 19 nov.
it is sad, really. recently my hp alarm reminded me that if it is still with me, it could have reached 16 weeks soon. i set this reminder alarm to keep track of my pregnancy age when i first found out of the pregnancy. and now it served as a reminder of the tragedy. my friend asked me to delete away the reminder but i decided not to. for a reason, unknown though...
the lost of this pregnancy causes my hubby and i more keen to have another child. we hope to accomplish this mission by 2009, meaning i have to conceive latest march to hae a december baby. Hope that this plan is also my Lord's will...
the lost of foetus is unknown. my gynae told me it was not due to what i had done or eaten. it is in fact common for foetus to stop growing in the first trimester. but maybe i know the reason....
God gave me a vision for this year. HE want me to be a good mother to my children. This makes me ponder how to be a good mother.... eversince i started to work from home, i am no more a good mother.... i have lost my focus....
recently i cried to God, i asked,'Lord, when are you returning me my yongle(the name i gave my lost foetus)?' and i think He answered,'when you are able to cope with the existing ones.' Frankly, i dun think i pass that yet. but for this reason, i will try hard.
dongwei and i agree that once i conceive, i will quit my current work from home job. my boss is supportive to the plan. but in order to be able to cope with the two and be a good mother so that God will give the third one, do i have to quit earlier?!?! May God guide me.
have been active in facebook recently. all pictures are posted in there and things are updated there almost daily. if you would like to visit me at my facebook, simply find me via my email jeslow@singnet.com.sg
i hope that in 2009, my relationship with my Lord will be closer. I really love to love my God with whole of my heart. I want to cling unto HIM no matter what happen.
Last but not least, God, thank you for all things that had happen in 2008. be it good or bad, YOU are by my side and that is the most important of all!
It has been so long since i last wrote here... I am writing in English now cuz my chinese program is encounting some problem. I am unable to activate it once i am online.. eeeeerrr..... so do bear with my english standard huh...
chinese new year is 2 days away from now. I am always excited like a kid for this season. i remembered myself crying in front of my mum at the end of the cny when i was 19 or 20 year old! omg!!!!
time really flies. i am now mother of 2 fellow, 5 yrs and 3 yrs (base on yr... hehe... makan sia as they both are yr end babies) i was pregnant with my third child last sep. unfortunately the foetus did not pull through. i had a miscarriage on 19 nov.
it is sad, really. recently my hp alarm reminded me that if it is still with me, it could have reached 16 weeks soon. i set this reminder alarm to keep track of my pregnancy age when i first found out of the pregnancy. and now it served as a reminder of the tragedy. my friend asked me to delete away the reminder but i decided not to. for a reason, unknown though...
the lost of this pregnancy causes my hubby and i more keen to have another child. we hope to accomplish this mission by 2009, meaning i have to conceive latest march to hae a december baby. Hope that this plan is also my Lord's will...
the lost of foetus is unknown. my gynae told me it was not due to what i had done or eaten. it is in fact common for foetus to stop growing in the first trimester. but maybe i know the reason....
God gave me a vision for this year. HE want me to be a good mother to my children. This makes me ponder how to be a good mother.... eversince i started to work from home, i am no more a good mother.... i have lost my focus....
recently i cried to God, i asked,'Lord, when are you returning me my yongle(the name i gave my lost foetus)?' and i think He answered,'when you are able to cope with the existing ones.' Frankly, i dun think i pass that yet. but for this reason, i will try hard.
dongwei and i agree that once i conceive, i will quit my current work from home job. my boss is supportive to the plan. but in order to be able to cope with the two and be a good mother so that God will give the third one, do i have to quit earlier?!?! May God guide me.
have been active in facebook recently. all pictures are posted in there and things are updated there almost daily. if you would like to visit me at my facebook, simply find me via my email jeslow@singnet.com.sg
i hope that in 2009, my relationship with my Lord will be closer. I really love to love my God with whole of my heart. I want to cling unto HIM no matter what happen.
Last but not least, God, thank you for all things that had happen in 2008. be it good or bad, YOU are by my side and that is the most important of all!
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